Wednesday, November 26, 2003

By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 12

In Which Killings Are Made, Panic Sets In, And Others Bite The Dust

Johnnyb452: WHY MATT
Johnnyb452: WHY
Johnnyb452: :'(
IdeaMan405: Give me your keys.
Johnnyb452: NO
Johnnyb452: NO I CAN STILL DRIVE
IdeaMan405: DAMMIT LISTEN TO ME
Johnnyb452: I CAN DRIVE DAMNIT
Johnnyb452: IT'S OK
Johnnyb452: *sob*
IdeaMan405: I'm not letting you within TEN MILES of that parking garage
Johnnyb452: Too late. I had to work tonight.
IdeaMan405: Aw shit. :-)

What's more unbelievable - the Ravens SCORING 44 points or GIVING UP 41? The officials did I don't know what at the end, but much like the Colts' comeback, the tuck rule game, and Bill Buckner, it should never have come to that.

Notice how without Dawkins, the Eagles' run defense suffers? It's because he allows them to bring Lewis up into the box and use single coverage on the outside. Blocked kicks~~~. See, at the beginning of the season, this game was the one I was worried about and I figured next week would be the cakewalk. Oh, how times change.

*crosses off 49ers*

It's only been two years, but the Texans are already at that stage where they're just good enough to give you problems. This just in: this Tom Brady? He's good, which I'm sure is killing Sven after all those Argo jokes he made two years ago. :)

You know, I probably would have had to sit through Steelers-Browns during the Eagles' commercial breaks. Maybe there was billiards on ESPN2 or something.

As if the Falcons didn't have enough problems. Now they can't field kickoffs. Billy Volek? Who in the BLUEST of all hells is BILLY VOLEK?

Chris Chandler's hurt? I am SHOCKED. Is that... is that KORDELL STEWART'S music? This may be Upset of the Year.

Anybody got the Rams figured out yet? No?

MY EYES! MY EYES! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING! Actually, these weren't as bad as the Browns' all-orange look. Tim Hasselbeck's almost as famous as his wife is. Yes, just ALMOST. Then Fiedler comes off the bench and... leads a comeback? WTF. *crosses off Redskins*

Keyshawn who? This game gave me unneeded agita. Does anyone WANT the ball? I believe Smith leveling Toomer in the end zone led directly to Toomer dropping that sure touchdown later. *crosses off Giants* *and, really, the Bucs too*

Coming up: The return of the FOX ROBOT TURKEY.

Fantasy Report: ISAAC BRUCE SCORED A TOUCHDOWN. So I'm up ten after Sunday with only Thomas Jones left for the Minions, and I figure I'm golden if he doesn't score a touchdown. So what do you know? HE SCORES. Then I see him run back a kickoff and figure I'm screwed. I won by 1.07. I'm 7-5 and in with one more game against league leader Chaz, who I may be able to cost the top seed in the playoffs if I can pull an upset. Westbrook'll likely replace Randle-El. I can't finish higher than third, and am hoping Nate wins and moves up to at least fifth so I don't have to face him in the first round ;)

TOP 3:
1. Kansas City - Chiefs win gut-check against biggest rival
2. Indianapolis - Edge TAKES OVER
3. (tie) Dallas - Wins battle of surprises
(tie) Philadelphia - Do YOU want to face these guys right now?
(tie) New England - Ditto

BOTTOM 3:
30. Detroit - You'd think a team owned by the Fords would travel better
31. Arizona - Little help?
32. Jacksonville - Little MORE help?

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