By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 1: Requiem For A Wolverine

If you can see the smoke coming from MetLife Stadium, it's coming off the #Giants' secondary. Tony Romo likes them extra crispy. #NFLKickoff
— NOT SportsCenter (@NOTSportsCenter) September 6, 2012

I mean, Kevin Ogletree shouldn't be getting that wide open against anyone. It just shouldn't happen.  There've been some weird center snaps in this game. A couple of them have gone off to the right and Romo's having to adjust way too much for any Cowboy fan's liking. It's like these teams switched identities: the Cowboys are torching defensive backs and calling crisp plays (though still committing plenty of penalties), and the Giants are dropping passes left and right. This was... unexpected. (Cowboys 24, Giants 17)

Signal Finder: PHI @ CLE, BUF @ NYJ, SF @ GB, SEA @ AZ (end)

The Modells asked the Browns not to do anything to memorialize Art. It's the best decision the Browns have made in the last 20 years. I think Cleveland would have given a better reception to John Elway and LeBron James combined. Also, Elway could probably still play quarterback better than both Vick and Weeden have shown so far, and LeBron would be the Browns' best pass-catching option if he suited up. That got deflected but that's a bad throw by Vick into what's just about double coverage. There are flags all over the place today. Flags and interceptions. This game has also been bad, but it's a different kind of bad than Giants-Cowboys was. This challenge will fail as there's no way to tell if it hit the Eagle player's foot or not, and it looks like he jumped over it. I'm not sure how I feel about showing the replay monitor view live in the stadium. Oh boy. Can't put that one on Vick, though -- Maclin could and should probably have caught it. I should also point out here that I can name maybe two guys on the field defensively for the Browns and Sheldon Brown hasn't played to my knowledge. Really, Vick? REALLY? You know what this is reminding me of? The last time they were in Ohio, the tie against the Bengals. McNabb was completely off in that game, Leon Hall and Johnathan Joseph were abusing their receivers, and Andy just kept throwing. I mean, the run/pass ratio has been ridiculous. And right as I say that the Eagles call three straight runs. Make it FOUR straight runs. And after all that, they miss a field goal. I have to say, Trent Richardson is probably the Browns' best skill position player by default and the Eagles defense has held him down. The corners have looked good and DeMeco Ryans has been all over the place. As much as we all implored Vick to learn to slide more, that's not the time for it -- he has to sell out there to try to keep the chains moving. If he'd lost the fumble there I wouldn't have been able to blame him for that. (It's not like I don't have four other reasons.) Celek! HARBOUR!

Celebrity NFL Tweet of the Week (from Angel Booth):

A win is a win but @eagles need to figure out the play calling and Vick. The amount of turn overs and holding penalties won't get us far.
— David Boreanaz (@David_Boreanaz) September 9, 2012

Let's get out of here before they change their minds. (Eagles 17, Browns 16)

Nice start, rook. You were the only one. (Redskins 40, Saints 32)

Look, if you've been a regular reader of these pieces, you know I'm not That Guy when it comes to talking about officiating. Or, at the very least, I make a concerted effort not to be. But the illegal block in the back on a kick return happens on every kick return. And it almost always gets called. How do you miss it when it happens twice on the same return? Also, how bad did the Packers look? (49ers 30, Packers 22)

More importantly, when you don't know the time out rules at the end of a game, at best it's an embarrassment to yourself. At worst you could cost someone a victory. Also, I was unaware Chris Webber was a replacement official. You'd think SportsCenter would've had that. (Cardinals 20, Seahawks 16)

This Week It Sucks To Be: The Raiders' backup long snapper. I mean, relatively speaking, being a backup long snapper isn't a great gig to start with, but when you end up blowing three snaps on Monday Night Football... ah, jeez. Hey, the Chargers won in September. Down is up, left is right. (Chargers 22, Raiders 14)

Honorable mention to whoever on the Rams was responsible for Kevin Smith in pass coverage. (Lions 27, Rams 26)