Thursday, December 10, 2009

By The Pigskin of Our Teeth, Week 13: Rise Up

O CANADA. Seriously, what's happened to Braylon Edwards? Any chance the Jets bring him back? Mark Sanchez clearly needed more sliding lessons. (Jets 19, Bills 13)

Signal Finder: PHI @ ATL, WSH @ NO (the last two minutes except for the final 32 seconds – WTF Fox), DAL @ NYG, SD @ CLE

Look, it's one thing to go cross-country and lose to a team that bad. But to have them come into your house and do that to you? Really? “I thought it was the Super Bowl loser who was supposed to be cursed.” Even so... I can't do it yet. But the Steelers are in “Act of God” territory now. (Raiders 27, Steelers 24)

The pace of this game seems really frenetic early, especially on the Falcons' side. Redman's acting at about two times speed. Well, here he comes. That reaction is decidedly mixed. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. It's the Leonard Weaver show! You know Moose enjoyed that. One thing I'm seeing right away is how on the ball the Eagles' defenders are. Very few runs after catches going on here. Why are the Eagles in the shotgun on their own 2-yard line? Oh. Peters is hurt again? He's becoming this year's Elton Brand. You know who's still good is Tony Gonzalez. The Falcons are finishing drives like they're the Redskins. I think you try to punch it in, too, because like Moose said, you make this, it's a one-score game. I might have called a different play, though, especially since they did that three times and didn't score. DENIED! Not even close. That's putting the hammer down and might be a game-changer. Is Andy going for it here? Well then. Touchdown Michael Vick. Has any other Falcons wide receiver caught a pass today? Smith's going to go for it again here, as he probably should at this point in the game. Oops. Sheldon jumped that route like he was Asante. Now the crowd wants Vick. This went well. (Eagles 34, Falcons 7)

I'm Sorry You Had To See That: Bears 17, Rams 6. Aside: How did Dick Stockton get stuck with this dog of a game? This matchup had Ron Pitts written all over it.

This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: The Meachem play is not only the “C'MON, MAN!” Play of the Year, it also sums up the Redskins in a nice little 30-second package. Twenty-three yards? And it wasn't even close! If the Redskins lose this game they should cut Suisham immediately. And of course the Saints go right down the field and score. Meachem was five yards behind the secondary. Really, Channel 29? You're not going to show me overtime? I think the only reason they were able to overturn the Sellers play in OT was that the Saints didn't take off and run with it after recovering it for whatever reason. It's GOOD! (Saints 33, Redskins 30)

This wouldn't be happening if Bill Belichick was still alive. (Dolphins 22, Patriots 21)

On the one hand, a Cowboys loss precipitates their annual December downfall. On the other hand, a Cowboys win buries the Giants, and I'd really like to have them out of the way as early as possible. Nice to see Roy Williams show up tonight. The Cowboys have been in control for the most part and yet they're only up three after the nice catch by Nicks. There's the Brandon Jacobs that's been missing, well, most of this season, to be brutally honest. You know how some animals are dangerous when cornered? That's what the Giants remind me of here. This is starting to look like a repeat of '06 when the Cowboys lost the ability to run the ball. Of all the adjectives that have been used to describe Jacobs, “fast” has never been among them. Has Romo really thrown 50 passes? (Giants 31, Cowboys 24)

They couldn't have moved Pats-Dolphins back to the late CBS slot? This is all we've got? Weaksauce. This apparently got interesting late. (Chargers 30, Browns 23)

Yeah, that's a touchdown. “Three feet?” Is that legal? I could see the Vikings sorely missing Winfield tonight. I mean, you can't double two guys. And it's coming true as Warner and the receivers are just lighting this defense up. You know two words I haven't heard all night? Adrian Peterson. The Cardinals have shut him down like I don't think anyone has. GUNSLINGER. GAH! The Henderson injury is giving me Tim Krumrie flashbacks. I'm not sure I expected this. That Warner kid's pretty good. (Cardinals 30, Vikings 17)

This is the first MNF game in Green Bay in December? Odd. No Ed Reed? That's dicey. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Hey, Rodgers has time to throw again. And he's not using too much of it, either. How does Finley keep getting open? LOL at Washington getting shoved out of the end zone stands. Wait, what? That didn't hit the ground? Wow. It's like the Antonio Freeman play in reverse. Willis McGahee lives! I've seen fewer flags at the United Nations. Just turn around and wave at the ball. Is it really that difficult? Also it wasn't very smart of Mason to grab Woodson and push him away when he was about to overrun the route anyhow. (Packers 27, Ravens 14)

FANTASY REPORT

aPaFL (8-5, W4): We didn't get a lot from Derrick Mason on Monday night, but we got enough to beat the Fire Island Ferries and secure the No. 4 seed in the playoffs. We brought in Justin Fargas to take Ronnie Brown's roster spot, and signed Mike Wallace for Hines Ward insurance, but our real question will be at quarterback: Favre or Palmer?

JackSux 6 (9-4, L2): Lost to the Original Pulp Heroes again after Rodgers' big night. I probably won't lose the top seed (I'm 150 points ahead of the top second-place team, so the tiebreaker likely won't go into effect) but I need to right this ship with one week left in the regular season and three 8-5 teams behind me.

Lincoln Continentals (11-2, W5): And here I was worried because late pickup Justin Forsett got hurt on Friday and I never reset my lineup. This was a crushing the likes of which I don't think I've ever put on anyone. My opponent had Shaun Hill at QB, who hasn't played in a month. Anyway, playoffs. Top seed here, and I'm facing Charlie in the first round AGAIN.

RANKINGS

TOP 4

1. New Orleans (12-0) – Entirely too close a call

2. Indianapolis (12-0) – 12 > 5

3. San Diego (9-3) – That Philip Rivers is so hot right now

4. Minnesota (10-2) – Speed bump

BOTTOM 4

29. Tampa Bay (1-11) – You're supposed to pull the QB after the fourth interception

30. Detroit (2-10) – Not historically bad, just dreadful

31. St. Louis (1-11) – Steven Jackson deserves a medal

32. Cleveland (1-11) – Worse than last year's Lions. Seriously.

1 comment:

Butch Rosser said...

What a BEYOND sly reference to me being at the fashion show. Kudos and other snack treats, sir.