Who's running down Chris Johnson? Really? Wow. The run of tequila jokes was... odd. Polamalu's flying all over the place. I don't think the weather would have made a difference on that one – Bironas just hit it badly. Are you kidding me with that interception? Well, that was helpful. Blocked! Bironas is not having a good night. Great throw by Ben on the touchdown. … PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. The Steelers' running game is nonexistent, and that's bad. How much did Sears pay Favre to agree to do that ad? You know who's quietly had a big game is Justin Gage. I wonder who Arians was referring to when he said he didn't want to 'ruin' Ben like he ruined someone in college. The Titans need to cover better. WHAT. OVERTIME (barely). I'm not sure I completely agree with Collinsworth's insistence that you just go down in Ward's spot. The Steelers should just pass on this third down. Ben's got a guy wide open in the left flat and he doesn't see him. I'M MIKE WALLACE. (Steelers 13, Titans 10, OT)
Signal Finder: NYJ @ HOU, PHI @ CAR, DEN @ CIN (end), WSH @ NYG, SF @ AZ (end)
You see this? You see why I was worried about the Eagles' defense? Wow. First and goal from the 1 and the Panthers can't do anything right. Or not. That was a sick cutback. That's why you're not starting, Quintin Demps. Nice pick by Sheldon. Now call the next play before they challenge it. … Uh-oh. If you're a Panthers fan you've gotta be wondering if Jake's having flashbacks. As nice as this is the defense has to be a bit tired in the heat. Is this GM commercial with the new CEO supposed to rhyme? … Let's see if the offense can help. Hey, a Brian Westbrook sighting! There you go. This doesn't look like a fumble. And it's not. Throw the flag, Andy! (I can't believe I just said that.) That's better. I was about to say we hadn't heard Jon Beason's name mentioned at all yet and then that happens. Wow. Jake is melting down like Serena Williams. Donovan's been running an awful lot today. Get up. GET UP. breathes sigh of relief And now I've lost sound on FOX. Kevin Kolb lives! And hopefully that's just a “let's not take any more chances and get him out of there because it's 38-10” move. Josh McCown? Really? And why is Matt Moore in the game now? Did McCown get hurt on that sack? (He did.) That's the second time Cole's blitzed from the middle untouched. I enjoyed the timing of Hanson's interception. That was interesting. (Eagles 38, Panthers 10)
That's probably the worst play to call when you're going for two. (Colts 14, Jaguars 12)
Touchdown! Good job, Mark. Of course it helps when the defensive back simply doesn't cover the receiver. The Jets are doing some funky creative things on offense. I like this playcalling. And the fans have turned violently on the Texans. If this defense can keep this up, David Harris is going to become a star. Thomas Jones is cutting loose now. (Jets 24, Texans 7)
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close (or this high-scoring): Ravens 38, Chiefs 24
Having seen these highlights, I'm glad that was all I saw. Cedric Benson lives! Who'd have ever thought that you could be rehabilitated by joining the Bengals? Royal should've taken the touchback there. ARE YOU KIDDING ME! And then he cuts across the field to kill time! That's such a Bengals way to lose. (Broncos 12, Bengals 7)
Last year it only looked strange. This year it looks wrong. Meanwhile, Quinn looks shaky. And what Peterson's doing to the Browns' defense just feels wrong. It's almost like they're afraid to try and tackle him sometimes. Touchdown Browns! I mean, it had to happen sooner or later. (Vikings 34, Browns 20)
The Giants seem to be wisely taking the “spread the ball around” approach that has been so effective for the Eagles over the years. How about Hunter Smith showing off some wheels? Hey, if he's a Redskin, who's punting for the Colts these days? The Giants' defense is downright terrifying with Osi back. (Giants 23, Redskins 17)
“The Inconvenient Truth?” Really, Rich Eisen? Really? It seems strange to say that a Week 1 win in Arizona is a big win for anyone but it might be in this case. (49ers 20, Cardinals 16)
Earl Bennett, ladies and gentlemen! These offensive lines are getting used and abused. I didn't even recognize half the Packers'. Three to two. That's more like it. It's either a classic Bears-Packers defensive standoff or both these quarterbacks are off. Probably some of both, I'm sure. Oh, Jay. What was that. I know Garrett Wolfe's not a tall man, but Brandon Chillar jumping over him to wreck Cutler was pretty good. Cutler's been pretty awful, but Rodgers hasn't been great. WTF fake punt? Nice coverage on Jennings at the end. (Packers 21, Bears 15)
U.S. OPEN INTERLUDE: I don't know if tall guys like del Potro (6-foot-6) are the wave of the future in the sport, but as Andy Roddick pointed out after he lost to John Isner (6-9) it's hard to defend against a serve from a guy that size because it's coming at you from an angle that you're just not used to. And if you've got a tall guy who can actually move around and cover the court, their reach gives them a few more inches to get to shots.
AGAINST: The throwback referee uniforms. I see T.O. didn't bring his hands to Buffalo. Moss shows you how you do that. Fred Taylor lives! Aaron Schobel with the interception? LINEMEN RUNNING WITH THE FOOTBALL. I love it. The Bills look inspired. … Did Belichick really go for it on fourth down there? I don't agree with that at all. They've got plenty of time. That's a well-run screen play. Touchdown! Are the Bills actually going to pull this off? Nice throw to Watson. The Pats aren't done yet, folks. Kicking it deep is interesting. Probably a coin flip either way. Look at all those red jerseys converging on him. Wow, he got drilled. FUMBLE! McKelvin should've taken the touchback there... did you see that slight moment of hesitation? Better to err on the side of caution if you're not sure, and he didn't look like he was. Also, like Gruden said, the return's not set up because the Bills might not have been expecting the Pats to kick it deep. And you know what's gonna happen now. Seriously, what higher power did the Bills offend? (Patriots 25, Bills 24)
I disagree with the reversal on the Murphy touchdown – I don't think he loses possession until after he hits the ground. You know who's good is Zach Miller. Is Heyward-Bey even playing? Nobody's evebn mentioned him. Really, Philip? Really? How about Russell throwing down on two guys. Here come the penalties – same old Raiders. Fourth and 15? Really? Wow! We've seen some of the worst blown coverages this week. Where's Tomlinson? Is there not a sideline reporter at this game? You know who's quietly had a big game is Legedu Naanee. The Lightning Bug! Was he even touched? That's such a Raiders way to lose, but they actually looked like they knew what they were doing out there. On the other hand, if I'm a Chargers fan, I'm concerned. (Chargers 24, Raiders 20)
FANTASY REPORT
aPa (1-0): It's good to have Drew Brees. Especially when Andre Johnson, Willie Parker and Ronnie Brown all lay eggs.
JackSux 6 (1-0): Another win, this one led by my stable of Colts. (even though McNabb somehow had more fantasy points than Peyton)
Lincoln Continentals (1-0): This one I almost forgot about. It's a 20-team league on Facebook with a couple guys from my other online leagues and a bunch of strangers. The autodraft yielded me three kickers. I'd rather not rehash that. What I will rehash is this: It's good to have Drew Brees, even though nobody else on my roster managed to score a touchdown.
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