Monday, January 22, 2007

By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth: The Biggest of Ups (and Downs)

Nice weather, which befits/is causing the slow start by both teams. Pick up the ball, Lewis. You're better than that. And why can't Colston seem to hold on to anything so far? This is starting to look like a 15-6 game, I'll tell you what. Well, this is interesting: after Benson had been getting all the carries so far as he's more of a straight-ahead runner in these field conditions, they've brought Jones in on this drive and the Saints can't reel him in. When was the last time Rex completed a pass? Man, the Bears just ran down the field on them. You ever notice how two-minute drills never get stopped at, say, midfield? Teams either get stuffed on the first set of downs or they go right down the field.

Let's see what the Saints have left. How about that! REG-GIE. REG-GIE. Yeah, nobody's catching him; stop trying to sell it. Seriously, when was the last time Rex completed a pass? At the same time, Brees has been unusually streaky. Is that snow? Advantage Bears, you have to think. Oh, there's one. Intentional grounding in the end zone? That's Aaron Brooks-esque. There's no reason for that. Did the tide just turn? Oh, wait, now it did. Great catch by Berrian. Fred Thomas is getting used and abused. I'd ask "Don't they have anyone better" but I've been saying all year that the Saints are going to get wrecked by the deep ball, and I'm kind of surprised the Bears haven't taken more shots, since Rex has a good deep ball. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Now they're just piling on.

Here we go again. And the Patriots' luckbox is activated and in full effect tonight, as the Colts had that fumble only to lose it again and Mankins fell on it in the end zone. Now that both teams have marched down the field on each other, let's see who breaks first. And the answer to that question is Asante Samuel jumping the route and going to the proverbial house. Now that the game's over, let's talk about how much money he just made. Nice job by Simms to point out on the replay that Samuel knew he could gamble on the route because he had safety help. I mean, it's not so much that the Colts can't come back, but the odds of the Patriots letting them come back are infinitesimal. That's the big thing. And you can see it right here; the Colts are completely fried. Although, that's a clutch hold by the defense complete with the sack by Brock. Uh, how about a flag or something on that corner end zone pass to Wayne? Something? Anything? I think Dungy decided to kick the field goal there just to talk Peyton off the ledge.

The game hinges on this drive. Right here. Rhodes has gotten some key runs on this drive. Harrison never drops that pass. Ever. Aaron Moorehead? Touchdown! We've got something resembling a game again. You know who's been huge is Clark - he's the one making all the big plays downfield. Is this the Patriots' defense this is happening to? And Hobbs doesn't help matters by basically playing Secret Service agent and blocking that pass with his back. Dan Klecko! That's right out of the Patriots' book using an ex-Patriot! Of course, the last thing you want to do after a comeback like that is to give up a big kickoff return. This team is snakebitten. I'm convinced. I'm not sure what the Colts are challenging there but I don't think it'll matter. Dallas Clark AGAIN! Are you kidding me? The Colts get one back under the same set of circumstances that the Pats scored their first touchdown? Now you're seriously got to wonder if this is it. If this is the game that it happens.

Stop giving them field position, please. Somebody get out there on Caldwell. Somebody. Anybody. I'm not sure who's in the bigger frenzy: the Pats' sideline, the Colts' sideline, or the announcers. Oh my God, he dropped it. Let's remember: the Chargers didn't want Caldwell anymore. Also, the Pats have too many Spurrier-coached Florida wideouts, who've had just as much success in the NFL as Spurrier-coached Florida quarterbacks. Also, why have they stopped running the ball? And now is the time where we trade field goals for no apparent reason. What's that about Peyton's thumb? Jim Sorgi? "Stay ready?" I don't like the sound of that. Ooooooohhhh! "My First Name Isn't Really Bob" Sanders almost had that one.

OK, the only people who can't be rooting for Peyton at this point are Patriots fans and people WITHOUT SOULS. Why am I nervous? Seriously, this is the most nervous I've been watching a football game that the Eagles weren't in that I can remember. Bryan Fletcher? Really? How much time left? Roughing the passer? Where? Oh, a shot to the head. All right. I'm not sure about suddenly deciding to run the ball down here. And that's why I'm not a head coach. TOUCHDOWN!!!!! And I have to believe they were going for it on fourth down or they would have passed on third. Brady's still got time, though Vinatieri can't help him now even if he was still there. MARLIN JACKSON FOR THE WIN!!!! Now FALL DOWN. From another board: "Blue-on-Blue crime." (They're both Michigan guys.) Butch: "IT'S MORNING AGAIN IN AMERICA!"

Everything has changed. Also, BLACK POWER.

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