And Harrington is greeted with a cacophony of boos. The Lions seem ... I don't really want to say 'inspired', but more so than normal. Can no one cover a deep route in this game? Harrington looks disoriented and confused: "What is that... that... is that cheering? I haven't heard that in years!" Thumbs up for the Holt interception. If this keeps up the Lions may have to bring back Billy Sims. The Dolphins were supposed to play this well all year, right?
May I just say that the Fox voters suck. Is this really the Bucs' first Thanksgiving game? Didn't we just see this? The Williams interception was unexpected because that's exactly the kind of pass that he gets torched on with regularity. This is almost a carbon copy of the first game. How do you get lit up by Tony Romo? I'm sure the Salvation Army will put that game ball to good use.
Signal Finder: PIT @ BAL, NO @ ATL, JAX @ BUF (end), NYG @ TEN, CHI @ NE (end)
So I just found out two weeks ago that I actually have NFL Network - are people actually sitting and watching "The Red Zone"? It looks absolutely mind-numbing and pointless.
Blood hatred~~~~ I'm still astounded that nobody seems to realize that Billick is saving his job with this run. I don't want to call this a 'return' to the 'old-school' Ravens defense because, well, it's the Ravens, but they certainly look like the unit we all remember. They are absolutely crushing. Literally. Every time Ben has pump-faked, something bad has happened. Every time. He should really stop doing that. I've already crossed off the Steelers, right? OMG a Kyle Boller sighting. This one's over. Yes, already. Seriously, this game took about two hours.
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Panthers-Redskins.
I have to believe having McGahee back has helped at least a little bit. We jumped into this one during the Jags' game-tying drive and it was pointed out that they were in that 'win on Monday night then go on the road' spot for the second time this season and they lost the first one. Matt Jones! Who? Yeah, this is going to overtime PROVIDED THEY COVER THE KICKOFF. I can't remember a better catch than the one Parrish made here. There's no way that's not good.
This Week It Sucks To Be: 1. Eli Manning; 2. the Cleveland Browns; 3. a Seattle meteorologist; 4. Jake Plummer; 5. an Atlanta Falcons quarterback, wide receiver, or tight end
True Stat: LDT touchdown passes in 2006: 2. Aaron Brooks touchdown passes in 2006: 2.
Here's a good spot for Eli and the Giants to get well, no? PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Wow, they're actually using Jacobs outside the two-yard line. This is different. Nothing has happened for the longest time in this game. When did Pacman decide to stop sucking? And why did Plaxico just give up on the route and not even try to tackle him afterwards? Well, at least they won't get shut out. All right, now this is getting interesting in the bad way. Did he just let Young out of his grasp? Are you kidding me? I mean, I know these days guys are getting roughing the QB penalties after actual sacks, but you don't let him go after you've got him. Don't you watch film? And now this game's going to overtime. Just throw it away, Eli. Just throw it aw- dear Lord. This should never have happened.
Predicted Week 15 Flex Game: Chiefs-Chargers (the best of a sorry lot)
REVENGE FOR SUPER BOWL XX. For all the hating I've done on Rex over the years, I think we all forget that this is only his 18th actual start or so. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. This game could end up 0-0 at this rate what with nobody wanting to score and all. It's a good thing Brady makes his money with his arm and not his feet. Man, both of these teams looked like crap.
On a professional level, this matchup yielded the best headline I've ever written: "STAMPEDE!: Colts run roughshod over Eagles". The problem?: That was back in 1999. OK, I take back what I said earlier about the Parrish catch. The Wayne catch was sick. Madden keeps harping on the Eagles' need for a big back and he's right and all, but I think it'd carry a little more weight if they weren't DOWN BY 21 POINTS. Although Westbrook's playing big tonight. Damn, Lito just took that ball out of Harrison's hands. That never happens. Why are they teasing us like this? They can't pull this off. Let me remind you all that I knew this was going to be bad. I did not, however, expect it to go down like this. I mean, I know the Colts' running game has been steadily improving all year, but this is ridiculous.
Has this been the worst year for Seattle weather ever? Seems like every Seahawks game this year it's been raining or raining or ... snowing? That's a new one. And that's the opposite of a good start. On 2+2 they're trying to figure out which team's had the fewest quarterbacks since Favre's streak began. I liked Kimmel throwing out that timely question to Theismann about handling the ball in the snow, but I got lost after the bit about Branch's gloves. The Packers should really be up by 21 at least. Did Hasselbeck practice this week? He's got no timing. I don't think any running play yet has ended with an actual tackle. It's more like the ball carrier just slides sideways for a bit at the end of the run and is touched down afterwards. Seriously, how are the Seahawks only down two at halftime? Oh, wait, I know what happened: the real Hasselbeck didn't arrive until halftime. Either that or there was Chunky Soup involved. It's like night and day. That may have been the quietest 200-yard rushing day ever. Alexander hearts ESPN. Johnny: "Well, that was fun. I think."
FANTASY REPORT USFLaPa (10-2, W4): We're basically racing with Chaz now for the No. 1 seed.
JackSux (3-9, L1): You know what's really maddening? I have more total points than half the teams in the league, and yet I'm in last place.
RANKINGS TOP 3:
1. San Diego (9-2) - Why mess with a working formula?
2. Indianapolis (10-1) - Edge who?
3. Baltimore (9-2) - Best team performance of the week
BOTTOM 3:
30. Arizona (2-9) - Just fire them all already
31. Oakland (2-9) - See "True Stat"
32. Detroit (2-9) - Harringtowned
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Thursday, November 23, 2006
The Not-So-Great Escape
Click the title. (The picture absolutely makes it.)
Hope none of you guys out there were supposed to get any of those.
Hope none of you guys out there were supposed to get any of those.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 11: The Beginning of the End
Signal Finder: TEN @ PHI, SEA @ SF, IND @ DAL
Yes, I started Chad this week.
It's way too early to be plugging the halftime show, isn't it? Jebus. That's 14 points the Eagles have flat-out dropped. What happened there? What do you mean, he can't put any weight on it? Oh, no, here comes the cart. This never ends well. Is Garcia still dating what's-her-name? Anybody know? Ever heard of tackling? Hey, the Titans found something Pacman can actually do. Good for them. Voting for Upset of the Year is officially closed. What's that, Andy? Oh. crosses off Eagles
Is it just me or do the Browns have the market cornered on ways to lose games they had won ever since they came back?
Is anybody going to score here? Anyone? Hello? Oh, here's ... oh, wait, Clark fell down. Scratch that. He was down, right? Right? Wow, Dungy really should have challenged that. Bad job by his staff on that one. Way to go, Vanderjagt! Both of these teams have looked pretty bad. Uh, Peyton? Who the hell was supposed to catch that? This should never have happened. I, for one, am disgusted. And NBC just threw up in its mouth.
This Week It Sucks To Be: 1. The Vikings' offense; 2. Andrew Walter; 3. The Browns' defense
Look who's back! Nice suit, Coach. Alexander looks rusty, like he didn't practice enough last week or something. Is this right? I'm seeing things, right? Eh, the Niners are so bad defensively it'll never hold up. See? Like I said. Whoa, big stop there. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. I'm going to repeat that, because it bears repeating. TIIIIICK tick tick tick tick TIIIIIIICK tick tick tick tick ... oops.
So the Chargers are going to come into Denver and lose again? Is that it? As a side note, we've heard that damn song three time already and the first quarter isn't even over yet, though that's not as bad as last week when they ran it three times before kickoff. Did we ever decide if it was the system or the backs? Because I have no idea who the hell Damien Nash is and he's gaining eight yards a pop. I don't think the Chargers are gonna be able to make this comeback running the ball. Well, they can always do that. Uh-oh. UH-OH. OK, the run LDT has been on as of late is borderline historic, isn't it? And what's sort of been overlooked in the midst of this and Rivers' improvement is how closely the two are related. This offense, while not as good overall as the Colts', has made the Broncos' defense look like clowns in the second half. Look at this. They're kicking off inside Broncos territory. That's got to be a first. This ending sequence here is completely unpredecented - you never see "the dumbest penalty ever" happen four times in a row. If the Chargers end up blowing this, Marty will set that stadium on fire on the spot, mark my words. Madden: "There's two footballs on the field."
I'm beginning to wonder if MNF should have a talk show-type announcer telling us who's going to be visiting the booth every week. Del Rio ALSO choosing to rock the suit. I like this trend. At the outset here, it looks like the good Jaguars have shown up tonight. The Giants are really spinning their wheels here. How'd he get away with that one? Was no one there? Eli is completely off, and they're going to miss Toomer more than people realize. I'm pretty sure I've expressed my David Garrard fandom before -- that big run he had there is what I'm talking about. The Giants didn't need this. You know the Jags are 3-1 against the NFC East (and could make a case for 4-0)?
FANTASY REPORT: USFLaPa (9-2, W3): So glad I didn't try to trade Brady last week for WR help. So, so glad. I'm smart. S-M-R-T. Oh, yeah, we're 9-2 after beating the Yorkville Gamblers.
JackSux 3: Oooh. This one's gonna be close. Jen had a lead of about 2.5 on me going into MNF, and I had Eli and she had Shockey. (EDIT: HOLY CRAP I WON! I WON! IT'S MORNING AGAIN IN AMERICA.)
RANKINGS TOP 3:
1. San Diego (8-2) - Comeback kids du jour
2. Chicago (9-1) - Bears 2, East Rutherford 0
3. Indianapolis (9-1) - Too many little things went wrong
BOTTOM 3:
30. Houston (3-7) - J.P. Losman? Really? Inexcusable
31. Detroit (2-8) - Leinart wins!
32. Oakland (2-8) - What question is Brooks possibly the answer to at this point?
Yes, I started Chad this week.
It's way too early to be plugging the halftime show, isn't it? Jebus. That's 14 points the Eagles have flat-out dropped. What happened there? What do you mean, he can't put any weight on it? Oh, no, here comes the cart. This never ends well. Is Garcia still dating what's-her-name? Anybody know? Ever heard of tackling? Hey, the Titans found something Pacman can actually do. Good for them. Voting for Upset of the Year is officially closed. What's that, Andy? Oh. crosses off Eagles
Is it just me or do the Browns have the market cornered on ways to lose games they had won ever since they came back?
Is anybody going to score here? Anyone? Hello? Oh, here's ... oh, wait, Clark fell down. Scratch that. He was down, right? Right? Wow, Dungy really should have challenged that. Bad job by his staff on that one. Way to go, Vanderjagt! Both of these teams have looked pretty bad. Uh, Peyton? Who the hell was supposed to catch that? This should never have happened. I, for one, am disgusted. And NBC just threw up in its mouth.
This Week It Sucks To Be: 1. The Vikings' offense; 2. Andrew Walter; 3. The Browns' defense
Look who's back! Nice suit, Coach. Alexander looks rusty, like he didn't practice enough last week or something. Is this right? I'm seeing things, right? Eh, the Niners are so bad defensively it'll never hold up. See? Like I said. Whoa, big stop there. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. I'm going to repeat that, because it bears repeating. TIIIIICK tick tick tick tick TIIIIIIICK tick tick tick tick ... oops.
So the Chargers are going to come into Denver and lose again? Is that it? As a side note, we've heard that damn song three time already and the first quarter isn't even over yet, though that's not as bad as last week when they ran it three times before kickoff. Did we ever decide if it was the system or the backs? Because I have no idea who the hell Damien Nash is and he's gaining eight yards a pop. I don't think the Chargers are gonna be able to make this comeback running the ball. Well, they can always do that. Uh-oh. UH-OH. OK, the run LDT has been on as of late is borderline historic, isn't it? And what's sort of been overlooked in the midst of this and Rivers' improvement is how closely the two are related. This offense, while not as good overall as the Colts', has made the Broncos' defense look like clowns in the second half. Look at this. They're kicking off inside Broncos territory. That's got to be a first. This ending sequence here is completely unpredecented - you never see "the dumbest penalty ever" happen four times in a row. If the Chargers end up blowing this, Marty will set that stadium on fire on the spot, mark my words. Madden: "There's two footballs on the field."
I'm beginning to wonder if MNF should have a talk show-type announcer telling us who's going to be visiting the booth every week. Del Rio ALSO choosing to rock the suit. I like this trend. At the outset here, it looks like the good Jaguars have shown up tonight. The Giants are really spinning their wheels here. How'd he get away with that one? Was no one there? Eli is completely off, and they're going to miss Toomer more than people realize. I'm pretty sure I've expressed my David Garrard fandom before -- that big run he had there is what I'm talking about. The Giants didn't need this. You know the Jags are 3-1 against the NFC East (and could make a case for 4-0)?
FANTASY REPORT: USFLaPa (9-2, W3): So glad I didn't try to trade Brady last week for WR help. So, so glad. I'm smart. S-M-R-T. Oh, yeah, we're 9-2 after beating the Yorkville Gamblers.
JackSux 3: Oooh. This one's gonna be close. Jen had a lead of about 2.5 on me going into MNF, and I had Eli and she had Shockey. (EDIT: HOLY CRAP I WON! I WON! IT'S MORNING AGAIN IN AMERICA.)
RANKINGS TOP 3:
1. San Diego (8-2) - Comeback kids du jour
2. Chicago (9-1) - Bears 2, East Rutherford 0
3. Indianapolis (9-1) - Too many little things went wrong
BOTTOM 3:
30. Houston (3-7) - J.P. Losman? Really? Inexcusable
31. Detroit (2-8) - Leinart wins!
32. Oakland (2-8) - What question is Brooks possibly the answer to at this point?
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 10: Home Sour Home II
Signal Finder: WSH @ PHI, DAL @ AZ, DEN @ OAK, STL @ SEA, NO @ PIT (end)
Nice weather today. Welcome back, Mr. Stallworth. Look at Dawkins come swooping in to break up a sure touchdown. That's why we love him. Was it a fumble or a lateral? I'm still not completely sure, as it looked like Brown slipped when he turned and the ball came out. The radio guys called it a lateral but Reid said it was a fumble. Yeah, it's officially not Portis's year. I'm looking at this, and I think it should be Redskins ball at the 1. Oooh, they got that one wrong. Re-kick? When did they kick it? What's going on down there? Oh, on the field goal. OK. Jebus. Stockton: "Well, that's over." And this is just about where the Redskins have been shutting themselves down all game. See? T.J. Duckett LIVES! WTF with the slant call? I need to ask: did Miller Lite pay to get some of the new crowd signs planted this season? We had "B-lock" this week, and I'm almost certain I saw "OFF-fence" somewhere either last week or two weeks ago. crosses off Redskins
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Bills-Colts. Though the Colts' running game just might end up being good enough.
Clearly I should bench Chad in fantasy every week. Looks like the Bengals have finally woken up. Looks like the Chargers have finally woken up. This ... this is nuts. Words are inadequate. And yet the Bengals are staying in front ... until that happened. LDT is a man among men. Clearly, I should bench Chad in fantasy every week. Marty: "If you didn't enjoy this ... then you might not enjoy football."
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close II: Patriots-Jets. Apparently the story all week was that Belichick was annoyed when Mangini took the Jets job against his wishes/advice, and that Mangini showed the Jets a tape of Clay-Liston I the night before. Still, there's no reason for this. You know all three of the Patriots' losses have been at home? The Jets are 5-4? Jebus.
Didn't the Texans beat the Jaguars like, just last week?
Eh, go for it. You're 1-7 and all getting fired anyway, for the love of God. Shame for Leinart that Reggie Bush wasn't around to push him over there. I have to say, if nothing else, these are nice digs the Cardinals have. Is there a more one-sided 'rivalry' in sports than this one? Do Cowboys fans even care about the Cardinals?
Way to go, Jake! I've clearly chosen poorly today. And this game has come to a screeching halt. Hey, the Denver defense is back! Ah, same old Raiders. They could've won this game if they didn't suck so hard.
Are the Saints regressing?
I need to know something; maybe you guys can help me out. Whose country is this?
And the weather here hasn't gotten any better. Not the start Rex wanted after last week. How do you let a guy break off a run - a RUN - like that on 3rd and 22? Can't anybody here hold on to the football? Well, Mark Bradley can, at least. Tiki hasn't been the same since he went out. The Giants are running out of guys again, it looks like. Holy - are they gonna do this again? Wow. Wowowowowowow. I don't know where 'hold a candle up to it' came from, but Al and John were right - the Giants really should've just tried to get closer for a closer FG attempt or just punted, since you're likely not getting the first down there. When they dug up the stat on third down runs of over 20 yards, I questioned how there's unemployment in this country.
I was going to predict the next flex game but I've already learned it'll be Eagles-Colts, which means NBC must have wanted to televise a bloodletting that night. Peyton owns us like he owns the Broncos.
FANTASY REPORT USFLaPa (8-2, W2): We held off the Mid Season Quitters (who are anything but at 7-3) and are tied for first.
JackSux III (2-8, L8): So, yeah, I benched Chad Johnson. Who proceeded to score 45 points. And I would have won had I played him. Shoot me. Shoot me in the head.
RANKINGS TOP 3:
1. Indianapolis (9-0) - Even the narrowest escapes work sometimes
2. Denver (7-2) - Broncos survive gut check
3. San Diego (7-2) - Bouncing into 2 vs. 3 showdown next week
BOTTOM 3:
30. Detroit (2-7) - Not much going right here
31. Oakland (2-7) - Bad enough to lose again
32. Arizona (1-8) - Should face Ohio State-Michigan loser
Nice weather today. Welcome back, Mr. Stallworth. Look at Dawkins come swooping in to break up a sure touchdown. That's why we love him. Was it a fumble or a lateral? I'm still not completely sure, as it looked like Brown slipped when he turned and the ball came out. The radio guys called it a lateral but Reid said it was a fumble. Yeah, it's officially not Portis's year. I'm looking at this, and I think it should be Redskins ball at the 1. Oooh, they got that one wrong. Re-kick? When did they kick it? What's going on down there? Oh, on the field goal. OK. Jebus. Stockton: "Well, that's over." And this is just about where the Redskins have been shutting themselves down all game. See? T.J. Duckett LIVES! WTF with the slant call? I need to ask: did Miller Lite pay to get some of the new crowd signs planted this season? We had "B-lock" this week, and I'm almost certain I saw "OFF-fence" somewhere either last week or two weeks ago. crosses off Redskins
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Bills-Colts. Though the Colts' running game just might end up being good enough.
Clearly I should bench Chad in fantasy every week. Looks like the Bengals have finally woken up. Looks like the Chargers have finally woken up. This ... this is nuts. Words are inadequate. And yet the Bengals are staying in front ... until that happened. LDT is a man among men. Clearly, I should bench Chad in fantasy every week. Marty: "If you didn't enjoy this ... then you might not enjoy football."
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close II: Patriots-Jets. Apparently the story all week was that Belichick was annoyed when Mangini took the Jets job against his wishes/advice, and that Mangini showed the Jets a tape of Clay-Liston I the night before. Still, there's no reason for this. You know all three of the Patriots' losses have been at home? The Jets are 5-4? Jebus.
Didn't the Texans beat the Jaguars like, just last week?
Eh, go for it. You're 1-7 and all getting fired anyway, for the love of God. Shame for Leinart that Reggie Bush wasn't around to push him over there. I have to say, if nothing else, these are nice digs the Cardinals have. Is there a more one-sided 'rivalry' in sports than this one? Do Cowboys fans even care about the Cardinals?
Way to go, Jake! I've clearly chosen poorly today. And this game has come to a screeching halt. Hey, the Denver defense is back! Ah, same old Raiders. They could've won this game if they didn't suck so hard.
Are the Saints regressing?
I need to know something; maybe you guys can help me out. Whose country is this?
And the weather here hasn't gotten any better. Not the start Rex wanted after last week. How do you let a guy break off a run - a RUN - like that on 3rd and 22? Can't anybody here hold on to the football? Well, Mark Bradley can, at least. Tiki hasn't been the same since he went out. The Giants are running out of guys again, it looks like. Holy - are they gonna do this again? Wow. Wowowowowowow. I don't know where 'hold a candle up to it' came from, but Al and John were right - the Giants really should've just tried to get closer for a closer FG attempt or just punted, since you're likely not getting the first down there. When they dug up the stat on third down runs of over 20 yards, I questioned how there's unemployment in this country.
I was going to predict the next flex game but I've already learned it'll be Eagles-Colts, which means NBC must have wanted to televise a bloodletting that night. Peyton owns us like he owns the Broncos.
FANTASY REPORT USFLaPa (8-2, W2): We held off the Mid Season Quitters (who are anything but at 7-3) and are tied for first.
JackSux III (2-8, L8): So, yeah, I benched Chad Johnson. Who proceeded to score 45 points. And I would have won had I played him. Shoot me. Shoot me in the head.
RANKINGS TOP 3:
1. Indianapolis (9-0) - Even the narrowest escapes work sometimes
2. Denver (7-2) - Broncos survive gut check
3. San Diego (7-2) - Bouncing into 2 vs. 3 showdown next week
BOTTOM 3:
30. Detroit (2-7) - Not much going right here
31. Oakland (2-7) - Bad enough to lose again
32. Arizona (1-8) - Should face Ohio State-Michigan loser
Tuesday, November 7, 2006
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 9: The Clearing
Signal Finder: DAL @ WSH, HOU @ NYG, DEN @ PIT
Really, Who Gives A Rat's Ass: Packers-Bills.
Three cheers for hated rivals. There's an auspicious beginning. Doesn't the chart also say that you should never go for two before the fourth quarter? If not, it should. Romo looks decent. If the Redskins lose, you can cross them off and start getting Jason Campbell prepped. Hey, T.O., nice catch. Wait, here they come now. And here's the Redskins' season possibly on the line. He missed? Good Lord. Did the Cowboys really get down there in like 12 seconds? LIQUORED-UP IDIOT KICKER. I don't know if that was a 15-yard face mask - in fact, I'm thinking it wasn't - but I'll take it. OMG Nick Novak again. That JUST made it.
Chaz: "Lost to the Dolphins, huh? They ARE the '85 Bears!"
You know who's good is Roy Williams. Even the biggest pessimist had to see this one coming out of the Lions at some point, as this is what Mike Martz's offenses do. The Falcons were supposed to win this game, right?
The Ravens are 6-2? Really?
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Texans-Giants. Seriously.
Rod Smith lives! I think Plummer's implosion in the championship game last year caused Shanahan to scale back his passing opportunities. His stats don't show it, but it seems like they're running the ball early in games more than ever. Man, the Steelers look like they've been hit by lightning. Still, there's some shades of the old Ben on the TD pass to Parker, and a good job by Parker to get himself open. The crowd cheering when Wilson replaced Holmes on the punt return ... you know it's a rough year. Wow, Javon Walker is just going off. Cuts across the field to beat the pursuit and then just ... he may still be running. Oh, no, he had to stop and line up to catch another touchdown pass. crosses off Steelers
The thing about this is the Colts aren't intimidated any more after last year. Wait, don't run it out! "Nice catch, Hayes. Don't ever fucking do it again." Huh, I thought I heard Maroney might not play tonight. And playing the role of Reggie Wayne last week will be ... Marvin Harrison. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Did the ending of the first half remind anyone of last year's playoff loss to Denver? That whole "Are these the Patriots?" vibe? What I'm noticing about Wilkins on his punt returns (and it's strange that I'm noticing this) is he doesn't force anything. He'll actually slow down and wait for some blocks to be set up instead of immediately changing direction. Wrap him up, Freeney! WRAP HIM UP! Great catch by Harrison. WTF Vinatieri. Wow. Brady was nothing short of bad tonight (Granted, he got no help from his receivers) but not as bad as the MNF loss to the Dolphins a couple of years ago that is still Upset of the Decade.
This Week It Sucks To Be: 1.Kevin Faulk Tyler Brayton; 2. Kevin Faulk; 3. Ben Roethlisberger; 4. Santonio Holmes; 5. A placekicker.
And things continue to go wrong for the Raiders. Gotta love that weather. The Raiders' defense has acutally sort of been able to hold the Seahawks down after that start, but they can't move the ball at all. Man, Moss is having an awful night. That's Bosworth? I thought it was Terry Bradshaw until he started talking. I'm starting to fear for Andrew Walter's health. What's helping the Seahawks is that they don't actually have to play all that well to win this game. What the hell was that? Was that the Harley Race knee? Is dude a Triple H fan or something? Throw his ass out! shakes head And the Raiders become the first team to be shut out on MNF twice in the same season or something obscene like that.
FANTASY REPORT
USFLaPa (7-2, W1): Back on track after LDT carried me to a win over Doom.
JackSux III (2-7, L7): The trade: Brad Johnson and Tony Gonzalez to Butch for Issac Bruce, Byron Leftwich, Michael Turner, and the Bengals D. The result: A loss to Butch. Chad Johnson is benched until he gets his shit together.
RANKINGS
TOP 3:
1. Indianapolis (8-0) - Two huge road wins give Colts top spot
2. Denver (6-2) - Nice bounce-back
3. San Diego (6-2) - Chugging along under radar
BOTTOM 3:
30. Houston (2-6) - Meh for moral victories
31. Oakland (2-6) - This wouldn't be happening if Al Davis was still alive
32. Arizona (1-7) - At least they didn't lose
Really, Who Gives A Rat's Ass: Packers-Bills.
Three cheers for hated rivals. There's an auspicious beginning. Doesn't the chart also say that you should never go for two before the fourth quarter? If not, it should. Romo looks decent. If the Redskins lose, you can cross them off and start getting Jason Campbell prepped. Hey, T.O., nice catch. Wait, here they come now. And here's the Redskins' season possibly on the line. He missed? Good Lord. Did the Cowboys really get down there in like 12 seconds? LIQUORED-UP IDIOT KICKER. I don't know if that was a 15-yard face mask - in fact, I'm thinking it wasn't - but I'll take it. OMG Nick Novak again. That JUST made it.
Chaz: "Lost to the Dolphins, huh? They ARE the '85 Bears!"
You know who's good is Roy Williams. Even the biggest pessimist had to see this one coming out of the Lions at some point, as this is what Mike Martz's offenses do. The Falcons were supposed to win this game, right?
The Ravens are 6-2? Really?
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Texans-Giants. Seriously.
Rod Smith lives! I think Plummer's implosion in the championship game last year caused Shanahan to scale back his passing opportunities. His stats don't show it, but it seems like they're running the ball early in games more than ever. Man, the Steelers look like they've been hit by lightning. Still, there's some shades of the old Ben on the TD pass to Parker, and a good job by Parker to get himself open. The crowd cheering when Wilson replaced Holmes on the punt return ... you know it's a rough year. Wow, Javon Walker is just going off. Cuts across the field to beat the pursuit and then just ... he may still be running. Oh, no, he had to stop and line up to catch another touchdown pass. crosses off Steelers
The thing about this is the Colts aren't intimidated any more after last year. Wait, don't run it out! "Nice catch, Hayes. Don't ever fucking do it again." Huh, I thought I heard Maroney might not play tonight. And playing the role of Reggie Wayne last week will be ... Marvin Harrison. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Did the ending of the first half remind anyone of last year's playoff loss to Denver? That whole "Are these the Patriots?" vibe? What I'm noticing about Wilkins on his punt returns (and it's strange that I'm noticing this) is he doesn't force anything. He'll actually slow down and wait for some blocks to be set up instead of immediately changing direction. Wrap him up, Freeney! WRAP HIM UP! Great catch by Harrison. WTF Vinatieri. Wow. Brady was nothing short of bad tonight (Granted, he got no help from his receivers) but not as bad as the MNF loss to the Dolphins a couple of years ago that is still Upset of the Decade.
This Week It Sucks To Be: 1.
And things continue to go wrong for the Raiders. Gotta love that weather. The Raiders' defense has acutally sort of been able to hold the Seahawks down after that start, but they can't move the ball at all. Man, Moss is having an awful night. That's Bosworth? I thought it was Terry Bradshaw until he started talking. I'm starting to fear for Andrew Walter's health. What's helping the Seahawks is that they don't actually have to play all that well to win this game. What the hell was that? Was that the Harley Race knee? Is dude a Triple H fan or something? Throw his ass out! shakes head And the Raiders become the first team to be shut out on MNF twice in the same season or something obscene like that.
FANTASY REPORT
USFLaPa (7-2, W1): Back on track after LDT carried me to a win over Doom.
JackSux III (2-7, L7): The trade: Brad Johnson and Tony Gonzalez to Butch for Issac Bruce, Byron Leftwich, Michael Turner, and the Bengals D. The result: A loss to Butch. Chad Johnson is benched until he gets his shit together.
RANKINGS
TOP 3:
1. Indianapolis (8-0) - Two huge road wins give Colts top spot
2. Denver (6-2) - Nice bounce-back
3. San Diego (6-2) - Chugging along under radar
BOTTOM 3:
30. Houston (2-6) - Meh for moral victories
31. Oakland (2-6) - This wouldn't be happening if Al Davis was still alive
32. Arizona (1-7) - At least they didn't lose
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