Monday, January 16, 2006

By The Pigskin of Our Teeth: The Division Bell Edition

The good people of Seattle seem... unsure of what to do with themselves. Wait, what did Alexander do there? The ball just sort of came out. That was strange. Darrell Jackson learning how to catch may be the most overlooked story of the season so far. Maybe he could give the punt returner some pointers. I see the Redskins haven't made any strides offensively. Hasselbeck's... not that fast, is he? Well, this one's over.

So just how many opportunities are the Broncos gonna squander here? Seriously, was there some sort of rule change that teams must always go for it on fourth down in the playoffs no matter the situation ever? Al Wilson's been playing big tonight and has really bailed them out. Well, that was a brutal call. So just how many opportunities are the Patriots gonna squander here? The Champ interception, for me, recalled a 2002 Raw where heel champ Undertaker said to Matt Hardy, "Why don't you come down here and I'll disrespect you again?" I never thought he or the ball got to the end zone, myself. Vinatieri MISSES? Troy Brown fumbles a punt? "They don't do this." There's a reason nobody's ever won three straight Super Bowls. It's hard.

Oh, great, I can hear the cackles starting already. But of more immediate importance is this: why are the Steelers starting out throwing the ball? The Colts cannot stop the rush, and there's no reason every AFC team shouldn't put a 3-4 in next year just for that purpose. Marvin only has one catch? Is Edge even in the building? Someone said the Steelers took their offensive game plan from the Colts and their defensive game plan from the Chargers. This thing might be over. Or not, as nobody can seem to get a hand on Dallas Clark.

Why are the Colts challenging this? There's no way they can overturn it. *sits there stunned* Of course, I've been wrong before. Hey, Edge made it! Nice to see you, finally. Great foot drag by Wayne on the two-point conversion. I should point out here that I'm of the school that believes that 99.99% of the time, an official's bad call is never a game's deciding factor. If the Colts pull this out, the Steelers will have blown an 18-point third-quarter lead. Bettis... coughs it up? (Gary Brackett? Lookit Rutgers all up in your area.) NICK HARPER! Think he scores with two good knees? Ben was the only one who was going to catch him. Ohhhh, that was it right there. Vanderjagt... MISSES! Dear God. Peyton's going to need a shrink after this one. On the other hand, as Jason said when I got into work, Bettis didn't deserve to go out like that. I wonder who Vanderjagt is gonna play for next year. Assuming he doesn't meet with an "unfortunate accident."

I'm afraid to get close to Steve Smith. I don't know where I'd land after getting knocked away by the deflector shield that appears to surround him at all times. The Bears might want to consider, I don't know, doubling him. Or at least putting Vasher on him because he's making Tillman look foolish. How didn't the Panthers score another touchdown there? Does anyone really think a guy who's started all of one game this year is gonna bring the Bears back? Well, maybe. No, I still say no. I'm becoming a Berrian fan, though. The Kasay PAT miss brought back to mind Buck's seemingly throwaway comment in the first half about the condition of the field. Good job on the replay that showed him slip. Who would've thought the Bears would score 21 points and lose? But no more Foster? Problematic.

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