Chris: "And is CBS really so desperate to find things to fill 94 hours of Super Bowl pre-game coverage that they felt the need to defrost Duran Duran?" I myself watched the Sixers blow an 18-point halftime lead to the T'Wolves. I'd call it a disgrace, but the Wolves could win the title, so I really can't.
Woooo. Beyonce KILLED.
All right, whoever had 15 in the "total number of captains for the opening coin toss" pool, please collect. Thank you. I wonder what the over/under on that was. And don't tell me there WASN'T one.
He Hate Me is in the Super Bowl. God bless America. Back, forth. Back and forth. Is Troy Brown gonna break one here? Viniatieri... MISSES? WTF? You know what we're gonna need soon is a turnover if this keeps up. It's not so much that the defenses are making big or great plays, it's that they're just not giving anything offensively. And this time Vinatieri gets BLOCKED. I didn't know about the four misses here - he must hate this place right now.
"Dad, that's just wrong."~~~~~~~
Aaaaaand it's a FUMBLE! That's about right. Now can the scoring start? Thank you. Whoa! How exactly did Smith end up being covered by somebody other than Law on that play? Now if you don't think this is enough time for Brady to do something, you're nuts. You know who's good is this Branch kid. Hey, when I asked for the scoring to start, I didn't mean all at once! "Can I say again how much I hate the squib kick?" Simms~~~~ Then Fox straps on a pair and calls a draw play, figuring nobody would see it coming. Fortunately for him, it worked.
"I gotta have you naked by the end of this song." Well... The real outrage should be that Justin Timberlake is even allowed within 100 miles of Janet Jackson, much less SHARING A STAGE with her. I'd add that he can't carry her jock, but it would sound and look ridiculous. See?
Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Vinatieri has new shoes.
That streaker guy better never show up at a WWE broadcast if he values his life. And I would not be shocked if somebody gets fired over that.
The commercials have been pretty weak, for the most part. "It's like having an angel by your side." That's pretty high praise for a FUCKING RAZOR. Idiots.
Think Walter and Sauerbrun'll kick Hunter Smith's ass next time they see him? "Pansy." *kick*
Remember what I said about Antowain Smith and the playoffs? He just scored. 21-10. Come on, safety. The Panthers need six here, and now we're going to see what Delhomme's really made of. And this is what. Three bullets, then Foster (!) bounces outside and runs away from everybody. The Panthers had two good runs in this game; this and the Davis draw. That's IT.
Don't do it, Fox. Don't do it. Listen to Phil, DO NOT DO IT. Don't do... don't... don't... GAH! It was WAY too early for that. They were gonna get at least one more possession, and most likely two, and now they're gonna have to do it again. Always take the easy points outside of five minutes, folks.
Hey, a Kevin Faulk sighting! A touchdown here probably ends it. Interception? On Brady? In the END ZONE? Now THERE'S something you don't see every day.
THAT was the longest passing touchdown in Super Bowl history? I'll be DAMNED. And this is what I was talking about - had they kicked the extra point last time, they'd be up two and just kick it again. Now they have to go for two. And they're denied AGAIN! Wow. The last time the Patriots trailed? That game against the Texans. They must REALLY hate this place.
Here we go again. Nobody knows the Pats' receivers, but they can run, they know how to get open and they hold on to the ball. I know it sounds like a lot, but it's all you need. HERE WE GO AGAIN. Mike Vrabel? MIKE F'N VRABEL? Now that's guts: "We need a go-ahead touchdown." "OK, put in the weakside linebacker." I think even the announcers were fooled on the direct snap to Faulk on the conversion - I know we all were.
The Panthers' offensive plan all night has been that this is Delhomme's game, so there's no reason to change course now. He's carving this secondary like a pork roast. Is this happening? Ricky Proehl's STILL alive? The Pats should try to get him just so he can't cause them any more agita. Holy crap. It's tied.
He kicked off... the ball... it went... how does... oh my God. He may be joining John Carney in Cuba if this ends the way it looks like it's going to. And even here, they call offensive pass interference. Dubious, though I guess you gotta get it in every week. The only complaint I have with CBS at this point is that they never mentioned the time out situation, not with a graphic or anything.
They're gonna ice Vinatieri. This led to this exchange in the office:
James: "Matt? Your stock line?"
Me: "This NEVER WORKS."
And sure enough. Haven't we seen this before? Max made a damn good argument for Vrabel as MVP, but that's not gonna sell any T-shirts. Forget Kid Rock - Brady's the pimp of the nation.
I will not call this the best Super Bowl I've ever seen - the game two years ago was a better overall game. And 23 (Niners-Bengals II) remains second - that last drive was art, a master at work. I'll put this in the second tier, with Elway's first win and Rams-Titans. Had it gone to overtime, maybe it's a different story.
FINAL RANKINGS!
TOP 3
1. New England - And with seven picks in the first four rounds, will probably only get better
2. Indianapolis - Manning about to get paid
3. Carolina - Believe
BOTTOM 3
30. N.Y. Giants - After tank job, could benefit from Coughlin's foot up their asses
31. Oakland - Norv Turner? *yawn*
32. San Diego - TRADE DOWN DAMN IT
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