By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 17: States of Emergency

YOU ARE LOOKING LIVE at a fine video tribute to arguably the greatest Eagle ever. (He and Bednarik are 1-2 depending on how old-school you may be.) And now it gets ugly. Eagles fans tended to understand why they did this, but they just wished the backups, well, played better.

The worst outdoor team in the league goes outdoors against a very good defense needing to win? This won't go well. Or WILL IT? Tip drill~~~~ And you know your defense is crap when the Redskins break the 18-point barrier on you. Excuse me, Mr. Moss? I'm sorry, where in the blue hell do you think you're going? Shouldn't you be out there trying to RECOVER THE ONSIDE KICK? If I ran that outfit, he'd never play for me again.

This Saints run just saved everybody's jobs and that's not right. Memo to Aaron Brooks: You're still not better than Jake.

Let me tell you something about this Willie Parker: He's the FOURTH running back. The FOURTH. You gotta make a field goal that short. Aaaaand it's a FUMBLE! OK, you've gotta beat the B- and C-teamers; I don't care who they are.

I can only assume that the Bills game was already over by the time CBS switched us to Jets/Rams, since nobody was really talking about the Jets needing to win at that point. Oh, that's why I can't see anything. The cable back here's frayed. What? Oh, right, the game. Apparently Herm made another curious timing decision or something. You're trusting Doug Brien outside of 42 yards? This is Doomed To Failure. Told ya! Here come the Rams again... it's good. So they're in.

Didn't we do this last year with these same two teams? And didn't it start this way the first time back then, too? And isn't it going to end the same way as back then, too?

What an anticlimactic ending this is. Eli's been making strides, but he hasn't won. I'm totally not sorry to see Key snap his ankle like that. This Julius Jones? He's good. Is this the Seattle game again? C'mon Eli. And Tiki's going after like 12 team records or something. A draw play? Touchdown! Now THAT'S cojones.

RANKINGS
TOP 3:
1. Pittsburgh - 15-1? Whoda thunk it?
2. New England - *cracks neck*
3. (tie) Indianapolis - Wait 'till next week
(tie) Philadelphia - Stumbling on a down note

BOTTOM 3:
30. Miami - "St. Nick", indeed
31. San Francisco - Should probably trade the pick
32. Cleveland - Starting from scratch... again