Thursday, April 29, 2004

By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth: The Drafty Edition

1. SAN DIEGO - QB Eli Manning, Mississippi (Traded to NY Giants)
Well. Welcome to the world's biggest microscope, Eli.

3. ARIZONA - WR Larry Fitzgerald, Pittsburgh
Forget Eli. Josh freakin' McCown better be as good as Denny Green thinks he is.

4. N.Y. GIANTS - QB Philip Rivers, North Carolina St. (Traded to San Diego)
I'm not even convinced the Bolts needed a quarterback, but what are you gonna do.

5. WASHINGTON - FS Sean Taylor, Miami
Skins in no mood to deal with the Poston brothers. They'll leave that to...

6. CLEVELAND - TE Kellen Winslow II, Miami
Giving up a 2 to move up one spot? Is the Cuyahoga on fire again?

7. DETROIT - WR Roy Williams, Texas
Probably shocked that Williams fell this far.

8. ATLANTA - CB DeAngelo Hall, Virginia Tech
Needed defense in the worst way.

11. PITTSBURGH - QB Ben Roethilisberger, Miami (Ohio)
Maddox wants a new contract. How about you stop sucking first?

13. BUFFALO - WR Lee Evans, Wisconsin
Well, THIS is a reach.

16. PHILADELPHIA (from San Francisco) - OL Shawn Andrews, Arkansas
Uh... what? There were rumblings the Eagles were going to move from 28, and John Welbourn complaining about his contract sealed it, as Reid said afterwards that Andrews was going to play guard. And nobody I would have taken at 28 ended up being there at 28. But STILL.

18. NEW ORLEANS - DE Will Smith, Ohio State
I just wanted to make a bad "Fresh Prince of New Orleans" joke.

22. BUFFALO (from Dallas) - QB J.P. Losman, Tulane
So who's dumber: Dallas, for trading out of this spot when Stephen Jackson fell right to them, or Buffalo, who moved up to reach for a guy they could have gotten in the second round?

23. SEATTLE - DT Marcus Tubbs, Texas
Johnny's boys go for needed defensive help. Also, "Marcus Tubbs" is a great name for a defensive tackle.

24. ST. LOUIS - RB Stephen Jackson, Oregon State
Whither Lamar Gordon?

26. CINCINNATI - RB Chris Perry, Michigan
O-VER-RA-TED! *clap clap clapclapclap*

29. ATLANTA (from Indianapolis) - WR Mike Jenkins, Ohio State
A playmate for Peerless.

30. DETROIT (from Kansas City) - RB Kevin Jones, Virginia Tech
Jumped back into the first round to get free-falling Jones. Lions did very well.

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