By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 6: Land Crashing

Signal Finder: ATL @ PHI, DAL @ MIN, NYJ @ DEN

I have no idea what to expect any more. That's a good start. What we're seeing here also is the Falcons' pass defense still not being quite up to par. I mean, how do you let DeSean Jackson get that open? cringes Well that'll put a stop to that. Like I've said before, you know it's serious when even the slow-motion replay looks like it hurts. It's almost a miracle that neither guy needed to be carted off. Did Maclin's knee hit? Yep. OK. Now we've got two drive-killing tipped passes for interceptions at both ends of the field. Moore's navigating this runback like a punt return. Siragusa: "I dunno; I don't think you can call a horse-collar on a quarterback." Also, finding out that Moose married a woman from Philly is kind of like John Elway's current wife being a former Raiders cheerleader... it's just not right. The other problem is that the Eagles were about to bury the Falcons and now they're on the board. You know whose name I haven't heard much today is Michael Turner. Four missed field goals at the same end? When did this game get moved to Heinz Field? The deep pass to Maclin off the fake end around was pretty sweet. Kolb was sharp today and has given Andy another problem to deal with, and I'm struggling to remember the last quarterback situation to be thrown into utter chaos in this specific manner. (Eagles 31, Falcons 17)

I remain surprised that the Seahawks managed to get more than a couple of tackling sleds for Deion Branch for all the good he did them. Just keep throwing, Ravens — that's how you beat these guys. Looking at it again, Brandon Meriwether's lucky he didn't get thrown out of the game for that. Leaving your feet and driving your helmet into the receiver's after the ball's past you? That's B.S. Part of why Branch has seven catches already is that he doesn't command the double- and triple-teams that Moss did. How did Danny Woodhead end up as the Pats' leading rusher in this game? If Branch doesn't pick up that first down this game might end in a tie. Well that took long enough. I was kind of hoping for a tie here just to see the playoff scenario calculator explode two months from now. (Patriots 23, Ravens 20, OT)

The larger development here is that Colt McCoy got out alive. Didn't Mike Holmgren say he wasn't going to play this year? (Steelers 28, Browns 10)

Man, Sanchez's interceptionless streak was living on borrowed time anyway (and the Broncos dropped two on the first two drives before that one). I see being traded still hasn't given Laurence Maroney the ability to run downhill. Tim Tebow lives! Somewhere, Urban Meyer is sighing wistfully. I feel like the Broncos' running game is suffering for the same reason the Cowboys have trouble — they use too many guys and don't use them effectively and in the right situations, and in Denver's case, they all do similar things. When it rains, it pours. So Prater hits from 59 but misses from 49? Whatever. How is Orton having this season with Brandon Lloyd and Jabar Gaffney as his starting wide receivers? That... was a penalty. SCORE. What was that? Where was that snap on the field goal in the first quarter? (Jets 24, Broncos 20)

Clearly, Mike Singletary needs to threaten to bench Alex Smith during the third quarter every week. (49ers 17, Raiders 6)

I may put the loser here in "Act of God" territory. Favre's getting pounded already. So who's that fumble on — Peterson or Favre? Greg Camarillo? Really? OK, if you say so. OMG. You idiots got flagged for the same thing LAST WEEK! Then Austin gets a touchdown taken away from him for pushing down a defender he already had beaten. (About five minutes in real time later, someone in the Jets-Broncos game also got called for offensive pass interference. Clearly the avenues of communication got cut off, as that penalty is called once and only once a week.) I know I criticized the Cowboys for throwing too much last week, but why wouldn't you this week with the Vikings down two corners? That's not usually as easy as Harvin made that look. That this game is tied at this point seems... appropriate, somehow. What E.J. Henderson did to Romo is reminding me of a Seahawks-Eagles game a few years back when Lofa Tatupu picked off A.J. Feeley like 16 times or something. And there's the go-ahead field goal. If I were a Vikings fan, I'd be thanking God every night I hit my knees that they play in the NFC. (Vikings 24, Cowboys 21)

What the... did the Raiders kidnap the Colts, steal their jerseys, and fly to Washington? I'm no longer sure who has worse hands: the Redskins' receivers or their defensive backs. Fun fact: This is the closest Donovan McNabb has ever come to beating Peyton Manning. (Colts 27, Redskins 24)

You know, the Titans are pretty good. (Titans 30, Jaguars 3)

FANTASY REPORT

aPa Whiskey (2-4, W1): Or, the NFC, as Max points out that seven teams are 4-2.

JackSux 7 (2-4, W1): Finally, a complete team effort.

RANKINGS

TOP 4:

1. N.Y. Jets (5-1) — Resourceful — and a little lucky — to the end
2. Pittsburgh (4-1) — It's like he never left
3. New England (4-1) — Warts and all, they're still not an easy out
4. Baltimore (4-2) — That didn't end so well

BOTTOM 4:

29. Dallas (1-4) - C'MON, MAN!
30. Cleveland (1-5) - At least they're scoring touchdowns this year
31. Carolina (0-5) - I hope John Fox has a moving van reserved
32. Buffalo (0-5) - Still managed to lose by nine

By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 5: The Artistry of Escape

Signal Finder: DEN @ BAL, WSH @ GB, TEN @ DAL

That's such a Bengals way to lose. What's happened to Carson Palmer? My God. (Buccaneers 24, Bengals 21)

I'm Sorry You Had To See That: Bears 23, Panthers 6

Well, there's an inauspicious beginning. What happened to Portis? Hey Packers, why didn't you kick the field goal? You go 85 yards down the field, you should really score. Just sayin'. And now the Packers are running out of bodies — I'm not sure they even have a tight end left. This Armstrong kid has basically become the Redskins' version of what Nate Washington was when he was with the Steelers; a guy you send down the field and throw a bomb to once a game that always hits. CLANG! Man, Crosby's fallen pretty far since his rookie year. And now if you're the Redskins, you're close enough that you can throw one up there and hope to get lucky with a flag or something. Or, you know, that can happen. Tackling him would be something to consider. Are you kidding me? Oh, OK. If Williams had brought that all the way back that might have been the most crushing defeat... well, ever, considering the circumstances. You know who's finally good is LaRon Landry. Good win for the Redskins, especially when you consider the fact that they've lost this exact game about 26 times in the last seven years. (Redskins 16, Packers 13, OT)

How many times did the Cowboys get called for pass interference on that first drive? Three? ESPN's Tim MacMahon: "Well, the Cowboys trail by 10 with 5:22 remaining in the first quarter. Time for Jason Garrett to abandon the run." Nice escape by Chris Johnson. Wow, it looks like that pass was actually intended for Bo Scaife but Kenny Britt caught it. Not only is Miles Austin the real deal after all, but something's lit a fire under Roy Williams also, as he's actually not terrible this year. Even scarier is that the Cowboys seem to have finally figured out that Felix Jones is their best back. On the flip side, David Buehler's making Cowboys fans miss Nick Folk. Mike Jenkins' play at cornerback today is reminding me of the salad days of Kevin Smith. He's been terrible. I've never heard of any of the Titans' defensive linemen but they're just wrecking the Cowboys — all three of Romo's picks came on balls tipped at the line, and the offensive line's been getting shredded all day today. This one might be over after that last one. Or not, as they've found Jason Witten in the end zone. I mean... whatever you think of the NFL's crackdown on celebrations, a rule's a rule. You know you're not supposed to go to the ground. You know that. This is why I don't believe in the Cowboys and wouldn't even if I didn't hate them with the passion of a thousand suns. You saw that graphic that said they're the second-most penalized team in the league behind the Raiders since 2006, right? The yardage they've lost today basically canceled out Miles Austin. Touchdown Titans! No, Phil Simms, the Titans didn't win because they made more big plays. The Titans won because they're not terminally stupid. (Titans 34, Cowboys 27)

This Week It Sucks To Be: 1. Brett Favre (and that was even before this happened); 2. The Chargers' special teams coordinator; 3. The guy on the Chargers who tried to scoop up the Rivers fumble that led to the Raiders' game-sealing touchdown; 4. Mike Jenkins; 5. Carson Palmer.

Toss-Up! Who will be more gainfully employed in two years: Ken Whisenhunt or Matt Leinart? Which quarterback's near-decapitation was more painful to watch: Max Hall's or Pat White's? Which throw was worse: Drew Brees' last one or Orlando Cabrera's first one? (Cardinals 30, Saints 20; Phillies 4, Reds 0)

Okay, kick coverage is starting to become an issue. Kolb looks much more comfortable than last week, which illustrates just how different the offensive game plan is with him versus with Vick (and also that two quarterbacks with such vastly different styles probably can't function long term as starter and backup, in whichever order you want to put them in.) They seem to be calling more of the short stuff that Kolb was checking down to last week, which helps. Hey, a Brian Westbrook sighting! You know who's good is LeSean McCoy. When did Trevor Laws stop sucking? Singletary is INSANE WITH ANGER. The fans chanting "We want Carr" are just insane. You want to replace one No. 1 overall bust for another one? You really want to do that? I think Smith just told Carr to go back to the sideline. Did I see that? Uh-oh. Didn't this happen against the Lions? Don't do anything stupid here, Kevin. Interception! This did happen against the Lions. Let's get out of here without making any sudden movements. (Eagles 27, 49ers 24)

LIGHTNING! All right, we'll wait. Here's a fun fact: Not only is Randy Moss the second player to play on back-to-back Monday Night Football games for two different teams (the immortal Keith Browner is the other), but barring injury, he's in line to be the only player who will play in 17 regular-season games this year. Is it wise to send a gimpy Brett Favre out on a trick play with Moss throwing it? (Also, that only works against the Giants.) Seriously, between that and how little Peterson's being used, it's almost like the Vikings flew Jason Garrett in to call their plays. Jets are scuffling on offense (Braylon has the drops again) but the Vikings look worse. Favre keeps grabbing his arm. He looks like a 41-year-old man playing quarterback in the NFL, and there haven't been many of those. See, that's how that's supposed to work. No need for tricky role reversals. LDT and Greene have been having their way with the Vikings' run defense. It's kind of sick. Revis looks hobbled tonight and the Jets have not been able to find Harvin to stop him. Um, Rex, why are you even calling a pass play there? You're lucky you got to two minutes. The irony is that Harvin might have had a shot at that one had he not altered his route by knocking Revis to the ground. Gee, that's never happened before. Though it was more "nice play by Lowery" than "bad throw by Favre." But still. (Jets 29, Vikings 20)

FANTASY REPORT

aPaFL (1-4, L1): Well, at least we didn't set a new all-time lowest score.

JackSux 7 (1-4, L2): I seem to be catching everybody on their best week, as I've had 40 more points scored against me than the next team.

RANKINGS

TOP 4:

1. N.Y. Jets (4-1) — Can Tomlinson keep this up?
2. Baltimore (4-1) — Offense starting to gel
3. Pittsburgh (3-1) — Welcome back(?), Ben
4. Atlanta (4-1) — Just doing what needs to be done

BOTTOM 4:

29. Cleveland (1-4) - At least they're scoring touchdowns this year
30. San Francisco (0-5) - The best 0-5 team ever?
31. Carolina (0-5) - Honestly, it's probably time to trade Steve Smith
32. Buffalo (0-5) - Jaguars-Bills: NO BUYS!

By The Pigskin of Our Teeth: B.T.S.I.

A missed field goal inside 40 yards in the playoffs? That's never hap– oh, wait. Actually, the remarkable thing here is that it happened to the Jets this time instead of against them. Wow. Not only did that play-fake fool everybody, but Braylon actually caught the pass. I'm not sure which is more impressive. That quarterback sneak looked as bad as Eli's last-gasp one against the Eagles in last year's playoffs. I'll say it again: Mannings don't make their money with their feet. Whoa, they let Brad Smith throw a pass. They almost scored there – the ball floated a bit and Cotchery couldn't get clear of the defender. The Jets have gotten pretty much everything they could have wanted so far – they've hit a few big plays and kept the Colts out of the end zone. Let's see if it lasts. And there's a turnover! IF the Jets can get six here it might be time to get concerned. But they don't, and that's a big hold by the Colts defense. See, here's the problem the Jets face: As good as Revis is, he can't cover four people at once, and Peyton's just not even looking in his direction any more no matter where he is. Beautiful. The DB there just mis-timed his jump and Collie caught it in stride. Touchdown! That was big.

It'll be interesting to see what happens now that Greene's down – Thomas Jones is no slouch, but they've really been riding Greene during this run. I don't know if I would have tried a field goal there, but it's really no man's land in that spot – the Colts' 34 is too close to punt, but fourth-and-7 is probably too far to go for it. Nantz points out that the two Jets wearing casts couldn't wrap Addai up. Have the Colts run the ball since his fumble? I'm not sure. And, seemingly inevitably, the Colts take the lead. Rex is hot about something. Oh, that's what – Sanchez just got blindsided. You know who's having a good day is the Colts' punter. Wayne was lucky to fall on that one. The Colts need a touchdown here. And thanks to the Jets' coverage issues, they're going to get it. How does Dallas Clark, of all people, get that open there? It really almost isn't worth betting against Peyton Manning at this point. (Colts 30, Jets 17)

Earplugs? Pansies. The Vikings are starting out doing what the Cowboys tried to do to them last week, which is worth noting somehow. Nice hole for Peterson to run through when they finally got around to running. Sweet cutback to the inside by Pierre Thomas on the screen pass. Ouch! Favre took a shot there. Throw a flag! It was after a handoff, for crying out loud. This is gonna be one of those games, isn't it? Bush plucked that one out of the air, didn't he? Hey, Reggie, you know that deal you allegedly made with Kim? You sure you want to be doing things like that? That is... yeah, he's got that. I don't even know who the Saints' nominal starters at wide receiver are and it really doesn't matter, thinking about it. Favre is taking some serious hits. Things have slowed down somewhat. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. THAT GOES FOR ALL OF YOU. There's at least three points down the drain. That's a big return to open the second half. David Thomas hasn't gotten this much run ever. What, again? If I'm Brad Childress, I'm putting in a call to Tom Coughlin to find out how he fixed Tiki's fumbling problem. Because this can be solved, and it's going to have to be solved. That's more like it. Seriously, Favre is getting his ass kicked out there. A high-low shot? Is he all right?

Of course he's coming back in. Whatever Peterson's got is apparently contagious. Oh, I see – that last spin Bush made as he got hit turned him around so that he could stick the ball over the pylon. Now BERRIAN'S fumbling? Unbelievable. Can anybody here hold on to the ball? All of a sudden the Saints can't cover Shiancoe. Try holding on to this one, Adrian. And we're tied. Two minutes, 37 seconds left. Your move, Brett. Twelve men in the huddle? Really, Vikings? Really? And after a time out, to boot? Now they're out of field goal range – or, at least, 2010 NFL Playoffs field goal range. GOOD GOD FAVRE WHAT ARE YOU DOING. And Aikman immediately says, “That's the first thing they teach you is not to do that.” Much like Nick Harper in 2006, if Porter cuts in the opposite direction of where he did cut, he's gone. Overtime! And this could conceivably go on for days. Having Thomas return this kickoff when he didn't return any of the others in this game – or, for that matter, this year (he was the kickoff returner last year) shows you how important this one is. I don't know about that pass interference call. Pierre needs to get a tighter hold on the ball if he's going to go airborne like that. Hasn't he been watching the game? Yes, Mark Brunell is still alive. You might not have known that before now. It's GOOD!

In 2001, Kevin Nash tore his bicep during a WWF wrestling match. About eight months later, on his first night back from that injury, he was in a 10-man tag team match and he blew out his knee. I was reminded of this while watching Favre take hit after hit after hit (and not actually get sacked once!) and said the same thing I said back then: This is a sign from God. He's telling you to stop. Nash didn't listen, and he's been doing the same thing over and over again since then. And Favre's last three seasons have ended with two interceptions and an illegal forward pass penalty.

Or, put more simply: Brett Favre IS who we THOUGHT HE WAS. (Saints 31, Vikings 28, OT)

----------------
Listening to: Talking Heads - Life During Wartime
via FoxyTunes

By The Pigskin of Our Teeth, Week 16: Feeding the Beast

There was a game tonight? Oh. (Chargers 42, Titans 17)

Signal Finder: BAL @ PIT, CAR @ NYG, TB @ NO (OT), DEN @ PHI

PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. The Ravens are getting flagged like they're the Raiders. Oh! How does Mason drop that?! Seriously, this is ridiculous – that one just knocked them out of field goal range. Why is Ben throwing deep? Another penalty? Of course it's on Walker – he's secretly terrible. Two straight sacks to end all hope. How depressing, and in retrospect, the Suggs penalty that wiped out Foxworth's interception return for a touchdown may have ended up costing the Ravens the game. Also, the Steelers held their opponent scoreless in the fourth quarter! Stop the presses. If you're a Ravens fan, you should be a little worried – that game in Oakland next week is hardly a lock at this point. Ask the guys on the other sideline. Better yet, ask me. grumbles (Steelers 23, Ravens 20)

Three incompletions for Brady against the Jaguars after throwing only two incompletions against them during the 2007 undefeated run. Yeah, I don't know either. crosses off Jaguars (Patriots 35, Jaguars 7)

Nice to see Nick Folk get work again so soon. Oh, wait, that's not... oh. OHHHHH. And now is the time for the Buccaneers to give the ball exclusively to Cadillac because the Saints can't stop him. You rarely see an overtime drive go like this with one team just running at will down the field. You know Tampa's beaten two playoff teams? And they're talking about dumping Morris after one year when they had to know they were going to be bad? They're nuts, right? (Buccaneers 20, Saints 17, OT)

I would not have done what Jim Caldwell did when Jim Caldwell did it. Only a five-point lead against a desperate team that's got a little bit of crazy in it and has held you down so far? Actual AP Line: “The Jets needed five things to happen and they all did.” It was 15-10 when the Colts' starters were pulled. The Jets then scored 19 unanswered points. I guess that means that Peyton Manning is also the Colts' best defensive player. (Jets 29, Colts 15)

You know who got the biggest ovation? Westbrook. Help me out here: if it's a backwards pass, it's treated as a lateral and it doesn't matter that it hit the ground? Is that how it works? Dumervil has become a monster in the Broncos' new 3-4 defense. Wait, they're tossing Stokley? For what? Ohhhhh. That was completely unintentional but there's no give whatsoever on that rule. This... isn't gonna work. I'm not sure if it made the broadcast but on the radio report Dawkins was pointing to himself after the Celek touchdown. You know who doesn't seem to be doing a whole lot is Brandon Marshall. I said this to my dad also: I still maintain that pass interference penalties would be cut in half if defenders just turned around. Nice catch, Avant. I think the Broncos broke into the Eagles' locker room at halftime and stole all their defensive plays. Hey, guys, how about wrapping up Gaffney instead of just putting a hit on him and hoping he falls down on his own? I don't think Macho Harris should return kickoffs any more. There's been some horrific punting in this game. Wow, McNabb's gonna get the first down here. And finally a good punt by Rocca. McNabb's run was huge, as it completely turned the field position around. Did he catch that? He caught that. You can see Reid mouth “One second” there. It's GOOD. Also not going unnoticed: the Broncos might be doing it again. (Eagles 30, Broncos 27)

Thanks for showing up, Redskins! (Cowboys 17, Redskins 0)

The Vikings do know there's a game tonight, right? Geez. Meanwhile the Bears actually look like an NFL offense for more than two consecutive plays. Not a fan of the time management at the end of the first half – they could have buried the Vikings there with a touchdown. The Vikings can't even get seven points out of a touchdown, and then they can't cover the kickoff. This could end very, very badly, especially since the Bears came back and scored in about three plays. This Aromashodu kid's having a big night. Don't look now, but the Vikings are grinding their way back into this thing. It's tied? Really? Are you kidding me with that kickoff return? And it's about the third one to boot and Hester's hurt tonight, so he hasn't been in on any of them. It's one thing for Kurt Warner to do this to a good defense. But Matt Moore and now Jay Cutler? That's a little ridiculous. I love the spin on that stat about how Favre's never led a comeback from being down more than 17 points like it happens every day. Did the Bears really call a time out right after the Vikings did? What is this, the NBA? And after all that, why was Rice not double-teamed? It's like the Jets against Gonzalez last week: you know where the ball's going; put a man in front of him. Now if the Vikings can cover this kickoff we'll have overtime, but that's been a problem tonight. Think Childress'll try to pull Favre here to protect him? Gould missed? That's rare. Peterson fumbled? That's... less rare. TOUCHDOWN! I feel like this was the Bears getting a small but meaningful amount of payback for all the times Favre has beaten them down in their house over the years. (Bears 36, Vikings 30, OT)

FANTASY REPORT

I went out with not one whimper, but three:

aPaFL: An uninspired loss to Brian relegates me to sixth place. Congrats to Johnny, who will represent our side in the Bacardi Bowl after winning our league playoffs as a 6-7 No. 7 seed (!)

JackSux6: Indeed. After getting knocked into the consolation final, I leave 59 points on the bench in McNabb and Sproles and lose... by 54. I will now light myself on fire.

Lincoln Continentals: Another big loss, this time in the consolation game. Such promising starts, such disappointing ends. Now I know what the Giants feel like.

RANKINGS

TOP 4

1. San Diego (12-3) – SING THE SONG

2. Indianapolis (14-1) – Just might beat Buffalo anyway with all backups

3. Philadelphia (11-4) – As usual, surging late

4. New Orleans (11-4) – Desperately need Sedrick Ellis back

BOTTOM 4

29. Washington (4-11) – Has basically packed it in

30. Kansas City (3-12) – Still bad, but at least under-the-radar bad

31. Detroit (2-13) – Well, it's better than last year

32. St. Louis (1-14) – No Jackson, no chance

By The Pigskin of Our Teeth, Week 4: Aged Like Fine Cheese

Signal Finder: NYG @ KC, NYJ @ NO, DAL @ DEN

If you have NFL RedZone, you could have heard this: Rich Gannon questioned the Bengals calling time out before their game-winning field goal attempt, saying “That leaves just enough time for the Browns' Joshua Cribbs to run the kickoff back for a touchdown.” Oh really? Mr. Gannon, I believe you know Mr. McNabb and Mr. Ward; have a seat. We... have something to discuss. (Bengals 23, Browns 20, OT)

PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. I mean, it's bad enough that you're a terrible team. You can't do THAT. It's almost as if the two Steve Smiths switched bodies or something. I see the Chiefs haven't gotten any faster. Or stronger, as Jacobs just ran over three guys. What the heck was Eli jumping for? The play before the touchdown pass to Nicks (which he had no business scoring on, by the way) he jumps before pump-faking again and missing Smith, then he reaches down and grabs his foot. Why did he jump? Who knows. The Chiefs' playcalling down here is pretty atrocious. How did THAT work? Not only did the protection completely fall apart and Cassel almost got taken down twice, but Wade and the other guy almost collided. If they had, it would have seemed... somehow appropriate. (Giants 27, Chiefs 16)

Butch: “Did Steve McNair's girlfriend put a bullet in the whole goddamn franchise? WTF?” Seriously, does what's happened here make any sense? Albert Haynesworth wasn't that important, was he? crosses off Titans (Jaguars 37, Titans 17)

Really, Who Gives A Rat's Ass?: Redskins 16, Buccaneers 13

Why don't the Broncos have their name or logo or something in the end zones? Nobody else plays there. The Cowboys sure are doing a good job of letting the Broncos hang around. I mean, can Romo overthrow any more receivers? OOOOH. Roy got lit up by whoever that was. OK, let's break down the Marshall touchdown: He jumps over Newman's back and picks the ball off his head. Then he turns and runs across the field into the rest of the Cowboys' secondary. He breaks a tackle, then reverses field and outruns five guys to the end zone. Look, I know Hurd made that big catch for you earlier, but why are you throwing to him twice down by the end zone? With Champ Bailey covering him, no less? Isn't that why you people pay Jason Witten? Champ's still got it. (Broncos 17, Cowboys 10)

Ah, the classic matchup. That's how Darren Sharper rolls. Remember how I said the Saints' defense only needed to be better than last year's for them to be dangerous? Well, this Saints' defense is better than last year's, and the classic matchup has been reversed. Sanchez looks like a guy with four career starts, but you knew this was going to happen at some point. (Saints 24, Jets 10)

I'm going to condense all of the analysis, both good and bad, you've heard about this game down into 10 words: You know why the Steelers won? Because they had to. (Steelers 38, Chargers 28)

Here's the other thing: Favre going into Lambeau in Vikings purple is – legitimately – a much, MUCH bigger deal than this. You know who hasn't done much so far is Adrian Peterson. And that won't help the cause. Someone please explain to me why the Packers, of all teams, aren't rushing Favre. You'd think they'd know better than anyone else how to mess with his timing and consistency. Seriously, they're practically daring him to beat them and he's doing it. Conversely, Rodgers is getting crushed out there and it's surprising that the Packers are still sort of in this game despite that. Playing the role of Mark Clayton tonight will be... Donald Lee. Most bizarre replay challenge ever? I say yes. Favre: “Well, I guess you gotta be remembered for something.” This game ended up being the most-watched cable program in history, and when you consider it knocked the likes of "High School Musical 2" from the top spot, is that really the worst thing in the world? (Vikings 30, Packers 23)

FANTASY REPORT

aPaFL (2-2, L2): Johnny beat me on the strength of 39 points from the 49ers defense. This is what happens when you play the Rams.

JackSux6 (3-1, L1): Damn that Jared Allen. If Donald Driver catches one more pass I wipe out a huge deficit and beat Butch. Oh well.

Lincoln Continentals (3-1, W1): Beating Rob is always fun.

And now, one week later than usual, the debut of... RANKINGS! (I compromised. WITH MYSELF. I'm doing top and bottom four this year.)

TOP 4:

1. N.Y. Giants (4-0) – Development of WRs key to early surge

2. New Orleans (4-0) – Have won with offense and defense

3. Indianapolis (4-0) – In case you haven't noticed, Peyton's on fire

4. Minnesota (4-0) – Hard to argue after Monday night

BOTTOM 4:

29. Tampa Bay (0-4) – This was to be expected, but maybe not quite this bad

30. Kansas City (0-4) – Slow and stupid loses the race

31. St. Louis (0-4) – This... this is gonna take a while

32. Cleveland (0-4) – I'll tell you what, I'm gonna run out of things to say by Week 9 at this rate