GUNSLINGER. This may be the Jets' biggest win since the merger. It's at least top 5. (Jets 34, Patriots 31, OT)
Signal Finder: PHI @ CIN, BAL @ NYG, DEN @ ATL (end), HOU @ IND (end), SD @ PIT
Oh, Sage. Will you ever stop sucking? (Colts 33, Texans 27)
Wow, the Ravens' defense just got gashed big-time. 20-0 before anything happens? So much for stopping the run. Where's Jacobs been since then? That's an unfortunate bounce. The more I watch the Giants the more unfathomable that loss to Cleveland seems. And what's getting overlooked somewhat is how maligned that offensive line was only two or three seasons ago. (Giants 30, Ravens 10)
And Donovan's starting erratically again. Wow. Haven't seen that in a while. The Bengals' goal line offense looks like the Eagles'. McNabb's throws have nothing on them. There's no zip, no height, nothing. Meanwhile, Fitzpatrick's getting pounded and the Great Ocho Cinco Freezeout Of 2008 continues. Seriously, why does Reid keep calling pass plays when the only guys worth a damn on the Bengals' defense are the two corners? Wait, whoa! What? That hit on Chatman didn't look that bad - Mikell just stood him straight up. Okay, this is really bad. And it just got worse. Good thing it's the Bengals. T.J. started out returning punts for them, right? Really? They've been that bad on third downs? Wow, the Eagles made a fourth-and-short. Stop the presses. And the field goal's the right move here - you have to get points. The Eagles should be coming after this punt, and yes, I know how bad the Bengals' offense has been today. Are you kidding me with overtime? And what's with the Eagles getting all these penalties all of a sudden? This game's gonna end in a tie (6:45 left) because the offenses haven't gotten any better. Fourth and 1 from their own 22. The Eagles should probably go for it, but they're not going to make it - they haven't made it all year - and when they don't make it, they're going to lose because the Bengals' field goal team is coming right out. Now it's the Bengals who should be trying to block this punt. Yeah, that was not roughing the passer. And some more questionable play calling as they decide to run the ball on 3rd down with a crappy RB instead of a quick pass to get closer. Oh. My. God. I know it's 47 yards but that guy's good. Seriously, that's such a Bengals way to... not win. (Interestingly, this happened 11 years to the day of the last Eagles tie.) I'd like to officially apologize to everyone who got sent to this game after their Fox game ended. Kenny Albert: "Nobody knows how to react!" This should never have happened. (Eagles 13, Bengals 13, OT)
Spencer Larsen is a man among men. Was it really that smart to do the 10th anniversary of the Super Bowl team with the team that beat them in the building? (Broncos 24, Falcons 20)
Wow. Maybe the Rams really were that bad. (49ers 35, Rams 16)
Is that snow? There's no way he caught that. Actually, wait. Wow. That is an interception to end all interceptions. Get rid of the football, Philip. Seriously. So much for the snow being a factor. It's already gone. If this game ends 8-7 I will laugh and laugh. Seriously, here was your scoring progression: 7-0, 7-2, 7-5, 8-7, 10-8, 11-10. I blame Norv. What is this foolishness now? What? Does it count or doesn't it? Amazingly, I'm still not sure. (Steelers 11, Chargers 10)
All blessings to the mighty Saint Anthony. Go 'Skins! One wonders how this new funky delivery's going to help Romo's ball control. Of course, he can make it easy on himself by just handing off to Barber 70 times. The Redskins are really locking in on T.O. Oops. Welcome to D.C., DeAngelo. Not much going on so far. Ouch. Owens got drilled and that's an unfortunate bounce. And here's Madden to disagree strongly with another replay decision. I'm not convinced Darcy Johnson and Martellus Bennett aren't the same person. Guess we'll have to hold off on those epitaphs. Damn it. (Cowboys 14, Redskins 10)
This Week It Sucks To Be: 1. Shayne Graham; 2. Donovan McNabb; 3. Rian Lindell; 4. Any officials working a Charger game; 5. Chris Perry.
Paging J.P. Losman. And the Browns are so bad they only got six points off of three first-quarter interceptions. Take some notes: when your quarterback's thrown three interceptions, the handoff is probably the best play to call for a while. And it's working, as Edwards has definitely settled down. That's a long run. Who is Jerome Harrison? Who are these people? Bills special teams! Did that pick get overturned or something? It must've. Fifty-six! Well, all right then. crosses off Bills (Browns 29, Bills 27)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (4-7, W1): We beat Ska's team. Ska's 2-9 team. Big whoop.
JackSux 5 (5-6, L3): Lee Evans can't catch one pass against the Browns? Really? Really? crosses off Seagulls
RANKINGS
TOP 3:
1. N.Y. Giants (9-1) - Reporter: "What's it like getting tackled by Ray Lewis?" Brandon Jacobs: "I wouldn't know."
2. Tennessee (10-0) - crosses off Jaguars
3. Carolina (8-2) - Sneaky good
BOTTOM 3:
30. St. Louis (2-8) - So much for the renaissance
31. Cincinnati (1-8-1) - At least they haven't given up?
32. Detroit (0-10) - Can't even win a catfight
----------------
Now playing: Clash, The - London Calling
via FoxyTunes
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 10: Locked Down
Signal Finder: BUF @ NE, STL @ NYJ, TEN @ CHI (end), SEA @ MIA (end), NO @ ATL (end), IND @ PIT, KC @ SD (end)
I'm sorry, was Scott Linehan re-hired? I'm shocked to learn that Favre hasn't broken 200 yards passing. I'm even more shocked that FOX is still showing this game. Seriously, how did we see the end of this game? (Jets 47, Rams 3)
This last drive by the Seahawks... man. I think this is why Holmgren's retiring. He's slipping. This is some awful play-calling. Did they throw to the sideline once? (Dolphins 21, Seahawks 19)
And this is the time of the game where Rex is 50-50 to throw a crippling interception. Well, a couple of bad incompletions will do, I suppose. (Titans 21, Bears 14)
Am I the only one wondering if Belichick's thinking to himself, "See that? I can still coach, you sons of bitches." (Patriots 20, Bills 10)
Brees looked furious after that interception return. (Falcons 34, Saints 20)
Oh, Ben is playing. Nice spin move by Wayne after the tip. That's a bad pass by Ben. In fact, why even throw at all in that situation? Seriously, Peyton is carrying this offense. They can't run the ball at all. That's also a bad pass by Ben. A penalty followed by a sack? Really? You're not winning this one, Steelers. This ending looks... familiar. (Colts 24, Steelers 20)
Wow, the Chargers potentially got hosed on that pass interference call. How did Gonzalez catch that?! I swear I've seen more quarterbacks throw into double and triple coverage this year than I can remember. You PLAY to WIN the GAME! I agree with going for two there, by the way. You're already 1-7 and going nowhere this year and probably next. What else do you have to lose? (Chargers 20, Chiefs 19)
Dan Patrick: "You had to really love football to watch this game." (Panthers 17, Raiders 6)
The Eagles being favored by 3 here may be the most puzzling line of all time. A Feeley jersey? They couldn't mock up a No. 35 for Hamels? PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Why is Jacobs trying to hurdle people? Big man doesn't need to be doing that. This really is a copycat league, though I can't see Coughlin ever adopting the Wildcat formation. Donovan getting his legs back in the last month is kind of a weird development. The VP-elect in the house! Can we stop Jacobs one time? Actual AP Line: "Baskett's reception on a fade pass was his second biggest catch this week." I keep looking up and the Giants always seem to have the ball. Wait, what? You're telling me Eli didn't cross the line of scrimmage? I don't buy it and neither does Madden. See, the ball's still in his hand, though, is what I'm seeing. Ah, so Ward is "Wind" and Bradshaw is "Fire". Glad we got that resolved. Hmmm. You know whose name we haven't heard all night is Brian Westbrook, and that's a bad sign. If you're the Eagles, do you consider an onside kick here? Why are they just standing there? (You don't call time out until you're across midfield, but still.) Is this the Super Bowl again? How do you not have another play called already? Geez. (Giants 36, Eagles 31)
I wonder what the thought process behind putting this game on Monday night was. That's an inauspicious beginning. I don't know who any of these people are. Hey, how about covering Boldin? Is Edge still on the Cardinals? I haven't seen him at all tonight. I'm still wondering what the Cardinals are gonna do to piss this one away. Oh, never mind. Worse quarterback: Shaun Hill or Sage Rosenfels? Seriously, there wasn't a 49er within 15 yards of where that ball went. (I got two words for Niners management: Byron. Leftwich.) Some dreadful attempts at tackling by the Cardinals here. I can't even call it tackling. Oh my God. First and goal from the 2? After all that? I guess this is our answer. This would be such a Cardinals way to lose. Wait, what are they reviewing? Oh, the spot, I guess. THEY HELD! THEY HELD! Welcome to a new and glorious age. (Cardinals 29, 49ers 24)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-6, L2): So check out how bad my season's going. I agree to a trade with Bob on Tuesday: Delhomme and Fitzgerald for Cutler, Chambers and Breaston. And it doesn't get processed until MONDAY. So I lose out on the 30+ points Cutler got against the Browns and get stuck with Delhomme's -0.9 effort against the Raiders. (Seriously, Russell outscored him from the sideline of the REAL GAME.) crosses off Seagulls
JackSux (5-5, L2): A bad loss at a bad time, as I get annihilated by Johnny. How does Coles get 1.90 points in a game where the Jets score 47?
RANKINGS:
1. (tie) N.Y. Giants (8-1) - As their games get uglier, they seem to be more effective
(tie) Tennessee (9-0) - Raiders fans everywhere are wondering, "Where the hell was this Kerry Collins four years ago?"
3. New England (6-3) - It's ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIVEEEEEEEEE
30. Oakland (2-7) - Maybe things can get worse
31. Cincinnati (1-8) - A joke searching for a punchline
32. Detroit (0-9) - Seriously... who are they beating?
I'm sorry, was Scott Linehan re-hired? I'm shocked to learn that Favre hasn't broken 200 yards passing. I'm even more shocked that FOX is still showing this game. Seriously, how did we see the end of this game? (Jets 47, Rams 3)
This last drive by the Seahawks... man. I think this is why Holmgren's retiring. He's slipping. This is some awful play-calling. Did they throw to the sideline once? (Dolphins 21, Seahawks 19)
And this is the time of the game where Rex is 50-50 to throw a crippling interception. Well, a couple of bad incompletions will do, I suppose. (Titans 21, Bears 14)
Am I the only one wondering if Belichick's thinking to himself, "See that? I can still coach, you sons of bitches." (Patriots 20, Bills 10)
Brees looked furious after that interception return. (Falcons 34, Saints 20)
Oh, Ben is playing. Nice spin move by Wayne after the tip. That's a bad pass by Ben. In fact, why even throw at all in that situation? Seriously, Peyton is carrying this offense. They can't run the ball at all. That's also a bad pass by Ben. A penalty followed by a sack? Really? You're not winning this one, Steelers. This ending looks... familiar. (Colts 24, Steelers 20)
Wow, the Chargers potentially got hosed on that pass interference call. How did Gonzalez catch that?! I swear I've seen more quarterbacks throw into double and triple coverage this year than I can remember. You PLAY to WIN the GAME! I agree with going for two there, by the way. You're already 1-7 and going nowhere this year and probably next. What else do you have to lose? (Chargers 20, Chiefs 19)
Dan Patrick: "You had to really love football to watch this game." (Panthers 17, Raiders 6)
The Eagles being favored by 3 here may be the most puzzling line of all time. A Feeley jersey? They couldn't mock up a No. 35 for Hamels? PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Why is Jacobs trying to hurdle people? Big man doesn't need to be doing that. This really is a copycat league, though I can't see Coughlin ever adopting the Wildcat formation. Donovan getting his legs back in the last month is kind of a weird development. The VP-elect in the house! Can we stop Jacobs one time? Actual AP Line: "Baskett's reception on a fade pass was his second biggest catch this week." I keep looking up and the Giants always seem to have the ball. Wait, what? You're telling me Eli didn't cross the line of scrimmage? I don't buy it and neither does Madden. See, the ball's still in his hand, though, is what I'm seeing. Ah, so Ward is "Wind" and Bradshaw is "Fire". Glad we got that resolved. Hmmm. You know whose name we haven't heard all night is Brian Westbrook, and that's a bad sign. If you're the Eagles, do you consider an onside kick here? Why are they just standing there? (You don't call time out until you're across midfield, but still.) Is this the Super Bowl again? How do you not have another play called already? Geez. (Giants 36, Eagles 31)
I wonder what the thought process behind putting this game on Monday night was. That's an inauspicious beginning. I don't know who any of these people are. Hey, how about covering Boldin? Is Edge still on the Cardinals? I haven't seen him at all tonight. I'm still wondering what the Cardinals are gonna do to piss this one away. Oh, never mind. Worse quarterback: Shaun Hill or Sage Rosenfels? Seriously, there wasn't a 49er within 15 yards of where that ball went. (I got two words for Niners management: Byron. Leftwich.) Some dreadful attempts at tackling by the Cardinals here. I can't even call it tackling. Oh my God. First and goal from the 2? After all that? I guess this is our answer. This would be such a Cardinals way to lose. Wait, what are they reviewing? Oh, the spot, I guess. THEY HELD! THEY HELD! Welcome to a new and glorious age. (Cardinals 29, 49ers 24)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-6, L2): So check out how bad my season's going. I agree to a trade with Bob on Tuesday: Delhomme and Fitzgerald for Cutler, Chambers and Breaston. And it doesn't get processed until MONDAY. So I lose out on the 30+ points Cutler got against the Browns and get stuck with Delhomme's -0.9 effort against the Raiders. (Seriously, Russell outscored him from the sideline of the REAL GAME.) crosses off Seagulls
JackSux (5-5, L2): A bad loss at a bad time, as I get annihilated by Johnny. How does Coles get 1.90 points in a game where the Jets score 47?
RANKINGS:
1. (tie) N.Y. Giants (8-1) - As their games get uglier, they seem to be more effective
(tie) Tennessee (9-0) - Raiders fans everywhere are wondering, "Where the hell was this Kerry Collins four years ago?"
3. New England (6-3) - It's ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIVEEEEEEEEE
30. Oakland (2-7) - Maybe things can get worse
31. Cincinnati (1-8) - A joke searching for a punchline
32. Detroit (0-9) - Seriously... who are they beating?
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
By the Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 9: Exercise Your Right
Signal Finder: GB @ TEN, NYJ @ BUF, PHI @ SEA
The Bengals' remaining opponents just breathed a huge sigh of relief. Actual AP Line: "At 1-8, the Bengals are no longer on pace to be historically bad." (Bengals 21, Jaguars 19)
Who ARE these guys? Nice Favre impression by Edwards. There's three Jets over there. Looks like Lynch lost his load running down the interception. Those 27 plays the Bills went without getting any points were pretty impressive. Think about that. They had the ball for a quarter and didn't score at all. GUNSLINGER. See, that's how you grind out a drive. I feel like the Jets got lucky here, which is saying something since they never win in Buffalo. (Jets 26, Bills 17)
Did we really have two non-quarterbacks throw touchdown passes in the same game? That's never happened before, right? I feel like this got under-reported. (Buccaneers 30, Chiefs 27, OT)
Bironas and Crosby have gotta be getting tired. "This is not Chris Johnson!" And neither side really gave too many inches apart from that big run by White. The thing about the Titans is, their passing game's probably their biggest weakness, but the way they play, we'll never find out for sure. CLANG! I've always wondered how frustrating it is to be an offensive player stuck on the bench in overtime. And Fox is forced to cut away at the worst possible moment (because Bironas has already clanged one off the upright, so this wasn't a lock by any means). Can't you do a split-screen or a little PiP action? Something? (Titans 19, Packers 16, OT)
ESPN Radio: "If you've never seen an NFL quarterback throw a changeup, there you go." This sounded like a massacre. Was it even that close? (Giants 35, Cowboys 14)
Seriously, how do you get fooled that badly on a fake on the first play you see? Not only is Donovan misfiring, but the play selection's been awful. Run the ball one time for the love of God. Of course, after that first play, the Seahawks haven't done any better. Are you kidding me with that? Double coverage? I almost burned my fries after that. Isn't this how we started last week, only less ridiculous? Man, the Seahawks are just getting stifled now. Hey, that's how the Texas Tech game ended. This is how we started last week. Ah, the tackle-eligible. It NEVER gets old. Brent Celek's playing BIG. Seriously, I think the Seahawks have had two big plays since that first score. You know what I'm noticing is that the Eagles seem to be knocking down a lot of passes, which is unusual for them. I don't know if that's been a problem with Seneca in the past or not. Now, about that goal line offense... (Eagles 26, Seahawks 7)
It's just not the same without Brady, man. The Colts are done if they lose tonight; let's put that out there right now. Have the Patriots had the ball yet? Harrison's returning punts? Wow. Gonzalez has been all over the place, or at least as much as you can be in a game like this. This isn't the first time Jabar Gaffney's dropped a gift touchdown against the Colts. I'm gonna have to go against Belichick on that one; I think he outsmarted himself. 52! GOOD! Why are the Patriots out of time outs? What an odd score. This was, like, the third-fastest game ever. (Colts 18, Patriots 15)
The Redskins have never worn all-burgundy before? Odd. What the hell was that? When you do that, it's not supposed to go straight forward. And the Redskins have six points without a first down. Is this the Eagles game again? Ooh, a blocked punt. That may be just what the Steelers needed given the way the defenses have clamped down so far. Byron Leftwich lives! And there's Nate Washington again. So much for Campbell's interception-less streak. Polamalu immediately signaled for Tomlin to throw the challenge flag. Like, before the play actually ended. Yeah, that's not even close. How do you not go to Portis there? We haven't heard his name all night, by the way. (Steelers 23, Redskins 6)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-6, L2): Worst. Performance. EVER. Seriously, this was a futility record and I don't even have to check it. 29.23 points. "High"lights: Backup JaMarcus Russell: -3.3. Selvin Young: Inactive. The Bears' defense: Lost about 15 points due to their mid-game meltdown against the Lions, of all teams. CHANGE IS COMING.
JackSux 5 (5-4, L1): This wasn't much better, to be honest. McGahee didn't play. Todd Heap might as well not have played. And I was against Kurt Warner.
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (7-1) - The total package
2. Tennessee (8-0) - Who's scoring on them? Seriously
3. Pittsburgh (6-2) - Ben's status pending, of course
30. Oakland (2-6) - They almost can't get worse, and yet...
31. Cincinnati (1-8) - It's not a good sign when "merely dreadful" is an improvement
32. Detroit (0-8) - What the hell question was asked that Daunte Culpepper could have possibly answered "Yes" to? Besides "Would you like a job?" obviously.
The Bengals' remaining opponents just breathed a huge sigh of relief. Actual AP Line: "At 1-8, the Bengals are no longer on pace to be historically bad." (Bengals 21, Jaguars 19)
Who ARE these guys? Nice Favre impression by Edwards. There's three Jets over there. Looks like Lynch lost his load running down the interception. Those 27 plays the Bills went without getting any points were pretty impressive. Think about that. They had the ball for a quarter and didn't score at all. GUNSLINGER. See, that's how you grind out a drive. I feel like the Jets got lucky here, which is saying something since they never win in Buffalo. (Jets 26, Bills 17)
Did we really have two non-quarterbacks throw touchdown passes in the same game? That's never happened before, right? I feel like this got under-reported. (Buccaneers 30, Chiefs 27, OT)
Bironas and Crosby have gotta be getting tired. "This is not Chris Johnson!" And neither side really gave too many inches apart from that big run by White. The thing about the Titans is, their passing game's probably their biggest weakness, but the way they play, we'll never find out for sure. CLANG! I've always wondered how frustrating it is to be an offensive player stuck on the bench in overtime. And Fox is forced to cut away at the worst possible moment (because Bironas has already clanged one off the upright, so this wasn't a lock by any means). Can't you do a split-screen or a little PiP action? Something? (Titans 19, Packers 16, OT)
ESPN Radio: "If you've never seen an NFL quarterback throw a changeup, there you go." This sounded like a massacre. Was it even that close? (Giants 35, Cowboys 14)
Seriously, how do you get fooled that badly on a fake on the first play you see? Not only is Donovan misfiring, but the play selection's been awful. Run the ball one time for the love of God. Of course, after that first play, the Seahawks haven't done any better. Are you kidding me with that? Double coverage? I almost burned my fries after that. Isn't this how we started last week, only less ridiculous? Man, the Seahawks are just getting stifled now. Hey, that's how the Texas Tech game ended. This is how we started last week. Ah, the tackle-eligible. It NEVER gets old. Brent Celek's playing BIG. Seriously, I think the Seahawks have had two big plays since that first score. You know what I'm noticing is that the Eagles seem to be knocking down a lot of passes, which is unusual for them. I don't know if that's been a problem with Seneca in the past or not. Now, about that goal line offense... (Eagles 26, Seahawks 7)
It's just not the same without Brady, man. The Colts are done if they lose tonight; let's put that out there right now. Have the Patriots had the ball yet? Harrison's returning punts? Wow. Gonzalez has been all over the place, or at least as much as you can be in a game like this. This isn't the first time Jabar Gaffney's dropped a gift touchdown against the Colts. I'm gonna have to go against Belichick on that one; I think he outsmarted himself. 52! GOOD! Why are the Patriots out of time outs? What an odd score. This was, like, the third-fastest game ever. (Colts 18, Patriots 15)
The Redskins have never worn all-burgundy before? Odd. What the hell was that? When you do that, it's not supposed to go straight forward. And the Redskins have six points without a first down. Is this the Eagles game again? Ooh, a blocked punt. That may be just what the Steelers needed given the way the defenses have clamped down so far. Byron Leftwich lives! And there's Nate Washington again. So much for Campbell's interception-less streak. Polamalu immediately signaled for Tomlin to throw the challenge flag. Like, before the play actually ended. Yeah, that's not even close. How do you not go to Portis there? We haven't heard his name all night, by the way. (Steelers 23, Redskins 6)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-6, L2): Worst. Performance. EVER. Seriously, this was a futility record and I don't even have to check it. 29.23 points. "High"lights: Backup JaMarcus Russell: -3.3. Selvin Young: Inactive. The Bears' defense: Lost about 15 points due to their mid-game meltdown against the Lions, of all teams. CHANGE IS COMING.
JackSux 5 (5-4, L1): This wasn't much better, to be honest. McGahee didn't play. Todd Heap might as well not have played. And I was against Kurt Warner.
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (7-1) - The total package
2. Tennessee (8-0) - Who's scoring on them? Seriously
3. Pittsburgh (6-2) - Ben's status pending, of course
30. Oakland (2-6) - They almost can't get worse, and yet...
31. Cincinnati (1-8) - It's not a good sign when "merely dreadful" is an improvement
32. Detroit (0-8) - What the hell question was asked that Daunte Culpepper could have possibly answered "Yes" to? Besides "Would you like a job?" obviously.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 8: You Lose, You Snooze
Signal Finder: ATL @ PHI, NYG @ PIT, CLE @ JAX
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Redskins 25, Lions 17
Welcome back, Brian. Now if you can get McNabb's accuracy back, that'd be a plus. Why is Ryan throwing into triple coverage? Oh. Mike Smith looks like Jeffrey Lurie. Hey, a quarterback sneak! This game has flowed the exact opposite way of every other Eagles game this season. You know who's good is Roddy White. And the goal-line struggles continue. Take the points! That's not a muff ZOMG THEY'RE OUT OF TIME OUTS AND CAN'T CHALLENGE. That's kind of a raw deal. (Eagles 27, Falcons 14)
How'd Smith stay inbounds? This is why you just can't believe in the Cardinals. (Panthers 27, Cardinals 23)
The NFL might have to rethink this London thing because everyone keeps finding things to complain about. Though there's no reason to take a home game away from the Saints, of all teams. (Saints 37, Chargers 32)
Ah, so that thing about the Browns playing in plastic bubbles for the rest of the year was a vicious rumor. I see. Rogers is all over the place and the defense actually looks quality. I'm not sure I see it flipping around, though. (Browns 23, Jaguars 17)
I don't know why Coughlin's challenging this. Jacobs didn't make it. And even if he did, there's absolutely no way to tell that he did. Ben's getting beat up again. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. You remember what I said about Nate Washington last week, right? FYI, it's not yet been determined which of Ward or Bradshaw is "Wind" and "Fire". So I come back from the bathroom and it's... tied at 14? Long snap, indeed. Seriously, that ball was at about the 20-yard line. I don't know how much the Steelers' defense has left. Did Plaxico not get booed off the field? I'm disappointed. (Giants 21, Steelers 14)
The Colts cannot stop this running game. I mean, it's not like they're not trying. Still, they're ahead because their defense has risen up when it's counted - well, until White broke that one off. Ah, geez, Peyton's having flashbacks. How'd they get from 17 to 31 so fast? Is it too early to cross off the Colts? Because they've got... issues. (Titans 31, Colts 21)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-5, L1): It's getting dire, friends.
JackSux 5 (5-3, W1): The league this year sets up nicely with eight teams so that everyone ends up playing twice. The second half begins with another win over Rob's little brother. Now to find a quarterback for next week...
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (6-1) - That was ugly
2. Tennesse (7-0) - That was gritty
3. Pittsburgh (5-2) - That was unfortunate
30. Kansas City (1-6) - Can't afford to give away games
31. Detroit (0-7) - Seriously, what's the point?
32. Cincinnati (0-8) - Stay away, Carson! You've got your whole life ahead of you!
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Redskins 25, Lions 17
Welcome back, Brian. Now if you can get McNabb's accuracy back, that'd be a plus. Why is Ryan throwing into triple coverage? Oh. Mike Smith looks like Jeffrey Lurie. Hey, a quarterback sneak! This game has flowed the exact opposite way of every other Eagles game this season. You know who's good is Roddy White. And the goal-line struggles continue. Take the points! That's not a muff ZOMG THEY'RE OUT OF TIME OUTS AND CAN'T CHALLENGE. That's kind of a raw deal. (Eagles 27, Falcons 14)
How'd Smith stay inbounds? This is why you just can't believe in the Cardinals. (Panthers 27, Cardinals 23)
The NFL might have to rethink this London thing because everyone keeps finding things to complain about. Though there's no reason to take a home game away from the Saints, of all teams. (Saints 37, Chargers 32)
Ah, so that thing about the Browns playing in plastic bubbles for the rest of the year was a vicious rumor. I see. Rogers is all over the place and the defense actually looks quality. I'm not sure I see it flipping around, though. (Browns 23, Jaguars 17)
I don't know why Coughlin's challenging this. Jacobs didn't make it. And even if he did, there's absolutely no way to tell that he did. Ben's getting beat up again. PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. You remember what I said about Nate Washington last week, right? FYI, it's not yet been determined which of Ward or Bradshaw is "Wind" and "Fire". So I come back from the bathroom and it's... tied at 14? Long snap, indeed. Seriously, that ball was at about the 20-yard line. I don't know how much the Steelers' defense has left. Did Plaxico not get booed off the field? I'm disappointed. (Giants 21, Steelers 14)
The Colts cannot stop this running game. I mean, it's not like they're not trying. Still, they're ahead because their defense has risen up when it's counted - well, until White broke that one off. Ah, geez, Peyton's having flashbacks. How'd they get from 17 to 31 so fast? Is it too early to cross off the Colts? Because they've got... issues. (Titans 31, Colts 21)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-5, L1): It's getting dire, friends.
JackSux 5 (5-3, W1): The league this year sets up nicely with eight teams so that everyone ends up playing twice. The second half begins with another win over Rob's little brother. Now to find a quarterback for next week...
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (6-1) - That was ugly
2. Tennesse (7-0) - That was gritty
3. Pittsburgh (5-2) - That was unfortunate
30. Kansas City (1-6) - Can't afford to give away games
31. Detroit (0-7) - Seriously, what's the point?
32. Cincinnati (0-8) - Stay away, Carson! You've got your whole life ahead of you!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 7: Are You Ready For Some... Baseball?
Signal Finder: PIT @ CIN, SF @ NYG, NYJ @ OAK
Cedric Benson's starting? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. What a sorry state of affairs. Holy crap, Ward just punked that guy. Seems like every time you see Nate Washington he's catching a 40-plus-yard pass. Ah, that's more like it. (Steelers 38, Bengals 10)
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Giants 29, 49ers 17
Admit it. You thought Brad Johnson was dead. Here's the thing: I still don't think Jim Haslett's a very good head coach, but the Rams should not have been as bad as they were the first month of the season. Jackson is shredding this defense. I wonder who regrets more the events that allowed him to end up with the Rams: the Cowboys (who traded down out of what everybody figured was his spot and went on to draft Julius Jones later) or the Bills (who traded up into this spot to take... J.P. Losman)? (Rams 34, Cowboys 14)
These two teams aren't supposed to play a game that ends up with this score. (Bears 48, Vikings 41)
Jets-Raiders, Channel 3? Really? Really? Favre is getting pounded. Ah, same old Raiders. There are flags all over this field. Sebastian Janikowski: still shaky after all these years. How many chances are the Jets gonna squander here? Favre hasn't thrown deep at all today, for one thing. Sweet Jebus, this game is horrible. You know what's strange? The stats say Thomas Jones rushed for 159 yards, but I don't remember seeing him once. I think at one point I actually wondered if he'd gotten hurt. Jay Feely from 52? I got doubts about this one. DINK. What. Are you kidding me. And he makes the re-kick. That'd be such a Raiders way to lose. Or tie. YOU'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME. Of course, he'll make this one. Told ya. (Raiders 16, Jets 13, OT)
Really, Who Gives A Rat's Ass?: Seriously, you know why Madden took this week off? Because he knew this game would suck. (Buccaneers 20, Seahawks 10)
That's quite the inauspicious start. You can see Cutler looking down at his hand like something's wrong. Looks like taking Pittman out was a bad move. Did he just fumble again? I can't figure out how a defense with this many good players on it can be so bad. Moss's attempt at a Lambeau Leap was... lacking. Seriously, this is a beatdown. Patrick Ramsey lives! The human leg's not supposed to bend like that. Who can figure out either of these teams. If I'm the Broncos, I sign this guy immediately. (Patriots 41, Broncos 7)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-4, W1): Oh, look, I beat Charlie again, mostly because the Bears' defense and special teams went off.
JackSux 5 (4-3, L2): Great Cowboys debut, Roy Williams. I should cut him out of spite. Or on general principle. Willis McGahee sitting on my bench because I still thought he was 50/50 didn't help either.
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (5-1) - It was ugly, but so what?
2. Tennessee (6-0) - The tests are coming
3. Pittsburgh (5-1) - Who needs a first- or second-string running back, anyway?
30. Kansas City (1-5) - Len Dawson is two phone calls away
31. Detroit (0-6) - Does anyone care anymore?
32. Cincinnati (0-7) - In the stormy sea that is this NFL season, the Bengals sucking is like a lighthouse
----------------
Now playing: Fabulous Thunderbirds, The - Wrap It Up
via FoxyTunes
Cedric Benson's starting? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. What a sorry state of affairs. Holy crap, Ward just punked that guy. Seems like every time you see Nate Washington he's catching a 40-plus-yard pass. Ah, that's more like it. (Steelers 38, Bengals 10)
This Week's Game That Shouldn't Have Been This Close: Giants 29, 49ers 17
Admit it. You thought Brad Johnson was dead. Here's the thing: I still don't think Jim Haslett's a very good head coach, but the Rams should not have been as bad as they were the first month of the season. Jackson is shredding this defense. I wonder who regrets more the events that allowed him to end up with the Rams: the Cowboys (who traded down out of what everybody figured was his spot and went on to draft Julius Jones later) or the Bills (who traded up into this spot to take... J.P. Losman)? (Rams 34, Cowboys 14)
These two teams aren't supposed to play a game that ends up with this score. (Bears 48, Vikings 41)
Jets-Raiders, Channel 3? Really? Really? Favre is getting pounded. Ah, same old Raiders. There are flags all over this field. Sebastian Janikowski: still shaky after all these years. How many chances are the Jets gonna squander here? Favre hasn't thrown deep at all today, for one thing. Sweet Jebus, this game is horrible. You know what's strange? The stats say Thomas Jones rushed for 159 yards, but I don't remember seeing him once. I think at one point I actually wondered if he'd gotten hurt. Jay Feely from 52? I got doubts about this one. DINK. What. Are you kidding me. And he makes the re-kick. That'd be such a Raiders way to lose. Or tie. YOU'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME. Of course, he'll make this one. Told ya. (Raiders 16, Jets 13, OT)
Really, Who Gives A Rat's Ass?: Seriously, you know why Madden took this week off? Because he knew this game would suck. (Buccaneers 20, Seahawks 10)
That's quite the inauspicious start. You can see Cutler looking down at his hand like something's wrong. Looks like taking Pittman out was a bad move. Did he just fumble again? I can't figure out how a defense with this many good players on it can be so bad. Moss's attempt at a Lambeau Leap was... lacking. Seriously, this is a beatdown. Patrick Ramsey lives! The human leg's not supposed to bend like that. Who can figure out either of these teams. If I'm the Broncos, I sign this guy immediately. (Patriots 41, Broncos 7)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (3-4, W1): Oh, look, I beat Charlie again, mostly because the Bears' defense and special teams went off.
JackSux 5 (4-3, L2): Great Cowboys debut, Roy Williams. I should cut him out of spite. Or on general principle. Willis McGahee sitting on my bench because I still thought he was 50/50 didn't help either.
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (5-1) - It was ugly, but so what?
2. Tennessee (6-0) - The tests are coming
3. Pittsburgh (5-1) - Who needs a first- or second-string running back, anyway?
30. Kansas City (1-5) - Len Dawson is two phone calls away
31. Detroit (0-6) - Does anyone care anymore?
32. Cincinnati (0-7) - In the stormy sea that is this NFL season, the Bengals sucking is like a lighthouse
----------------
Now playing: Fabulous Thunderbirds, The - Wrap It Up
via FoxyTunes
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 6: Don't Leave Just Yet
Signal Finder: BAL @ IND (first half), STL @ WSH, CIN @ NYJ (second half), MIA @ HOU (end), PHI @ SF, DAL @ AZ (end)
Dan Orlovsky's (Close To) Actual Quote: "When the whistle blew, I thought, 'Did we false start? Were they offsides? Man, I'm an idiot.'" (Vikings 12, Lions 10)
I'm not sold on the Redskins' game plan so far - they should be bum-rushing the Rams' awful secondary. Plus they look a little sluggish. JUST FALL ON IT. That's the first thing that's gone right all year for the Rams. "Incognito", huh? That's a wildly inappropriate name right now. He probably just cost them the game. Or not. Lord knows I've been wrong before. (Rams 19, Redskins 17)
Wow, Schaub walked in untouched. Kubiak learned that play from Shanahan. Why are they going for two here? There's not enough time for the Dolphins to stop the clock and kick a field goal. (Texans 29, Dolphins 28)
Yeah, this is exactly why I hate the squib kick. Are the Falcons really 4-2? (Falcons 22, Bears 20)
Cross-country trip after a bad loss for a game they always lose - you can understand my trepidation. "Strikeability?" That's a new one to alert to Simmons, I think. Nolan's jacket looks too big. Allen Rossum! Hey, I remember you. stop doing that. "Splashability?" Tim Ryan's making this up as he goes along, isn't he? The double pitch? That's one I've never seen before. If Jackson goes left, he's in. Oh, no. What do you wanna call that one, Ryan? "Missedblockability?" This is where it all goes south. Or maybe not, as McNabb's trying his best to rally the troops. You know who's been good today is Buckhalter. The hell are they challenging that for? You'd almost think Mike Martz was invol... oh, wait. Juqua Parker! With SPEED! I still don't know how this happened. (Eagles 40, 49ers 26)
I know, "letter of the law" and all that, but it seems kind of harsh to call offsides when the guy's clearly hurt. Yeah, it's five more yards. Don't you people know that? BLOCKED! WHAT?! Wow. This would be such a Cardinals way for them to lose. BLOCKED! WHAT?! Wow. That was such a Cardinals way for them to lose. And yet... (Cardinals 30, Cowboys 24, OT)
Think the Chargers watched Ravens-Colts and said, "Hey, let's do that to... Deltha O'Neal?" I wonder what vengeance tastes like. Probably pepper bacon. Mmmmm. There's a couple more of these coming, Patriots fans. (Chargers 30, Patriots 10)
Odds of a Brady Quinn sighting tonight? 3:1? Jamal Lewis is still getting it done. Is this Old Eli resurfacing? I'm not sure it matters as I don't thin the Browns can hold the giants down all night. Unless that keeps happening. This is Old Eli resurfacing. Wow. That's Dawg Pound Pride right there. (Browns 35, Giants 14)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (2-4, L1): Got nothing from anyone. NEXT.
JackSux (4-2, L1): Losing to Rob is never fun.
RANKINGS:
1. N.Y. Giants (4-1) - Man, I don't know. Seriously. I have no idea
2. Tennessee (5-0) - Yes, I'm pulling an Alabama in them
3. Pittsburgh (4-1) - Same here
30. St. Louis (1-4) - They tried their damnedest to lose
31. Cincinnati (0-6) - Gah
32. Detroit (0-5) - Are unaware of the dimensions of the field
Dan Orlovsky's (Close To) Actual Quote: "When the whistle blew, I thought, 'Did we false start? Were they offsides? Man, I'm an idiot.'" (Vikings 12, Lions 10)
I'm not sold on the Redskins' game plan so far - they should be bum-rushing the Rams' awful secondary. Plus they look a little sluggish. JUST FALL ON IT. That's the first thing that's gone right all year for the Rams. "Incognito", huh? That's a wildly inappropriate name right now. He probably just cost them the game. Or not. Lord knows I've been wrong before. (Rams 19, Redskins 17)
Wow, Schaub walked in untouched. Kubiak learned that play from Shanahan. Why are they going for two here? There's not enough time for the Dolphins to stop the clock and kick a field goal. (Texans 29, Dolphins 28)
Yeah, this is exactly why I hate the squib kick. Are the Falcons really 4-2? (Falcons 22, Bears 20)
Cross-country trip after a bad loss for a game they always lose - you can understand my trepidation. "Strikeability?" That's a new one to alert to Simmons, I think. Nolan's jacket looks too big. Allen Rossum! Hey, I remember you. stop doing that. "Splashability?" Tim Ryan's making this up as he goes along, isn't he? The double pitch? That's one I've never seen before. If Jackson goes left, he's in. Oh, no. What do you wanna call that one, Ryan? "Missedblockability?" This is where it all goes south. Or maybe not, as McNabb's trying his best to rally the troops. You know who's been good today is Buckhalter. The hell are they challenging that for? You'd almost think Mike Martz was invol... oh, wait. Juqua Parker! With SPEED! I still don't know how this happened. (Eagles 40, 49ers 26)
I know, "letter of the law" and all that, but it seems kind of harsh to call offsides when the guy's clearly hurt. Yeah, it's five more yards. Don't you people know that? BLOCKED! WHAT?! Wow. This would be such a Cardinals way for them to lose. BLOCKED! WHAT?! Wow. That was such a Cardinals way for them to lose. And yet... (Cardinals 30, Cowboys 24, OT)
Think the Chargers watched Ravens-Colts and said, "Hey, let's do that to... Deltha O'Neal?" I wonder what vengeance tastes like. Probably pepper bacon. Mmmmm. There's a couple more of these coming, Patriots fans. (Chargers 30, Patriots 10)
Odds of a Brady Quinn sighting tonight? 3:1? Jamal Lewis is still getting it done. Is this Old Eli resurfacing? I'm not sure it matters as I don't thin the Browns can hold the giants down all night. Unless that keeps happening. This is Old Eli resurfacing. Wow. That's Dawg Pound Pride right there. (Browns 35, Giants 14)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (2-4, L1): Got nothing from anyone. NEXT.
JackSux (4-2, L1): Losing to Rob is never fun.
RANKINGS:
1. N.Y. Giants (4-1) - Man, I don't know. Seriously. I have no idea
2. Tennessee (5-0) - Yes, I'm pulling an Alabama in them
3. Pittsburgh (4-1) - Same here
30. St. Louis (1-4) - They tried their damnedest to lose
31. Cincinnati (0-6) - Gah
32. Detroit (0-5) - Are unaware of the dimensions of the field
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
By The Pigskin Of Our Teeth, Week 5: Points of Comparison
Signal Finder: WSH @ PHI, PHI @ MIL, CIN @ DAL
Mike and Mike floated the idea Monday morning that the start times for games on the East Coast where a West Coast team is visiting should be pushed back to 4 because the visiting team's gotten slaughtered every tine it's happened so far. I don't know if there's anything to that, but I don't know how else you explain this. (Dolphins 17, Chargers 10)
Snap. Crackle. Pop. (That's for the Rollins HR.) What a sweet drive. And that's why they drafted the kid. Though the refs never pick up the flag on a block in the back on a return (which happens ALL THE TIME), so that was kind of strange. I feel like Buck's going to be a step behind the seemingly random Phillies-related cheering all day. While the Eagles' idea of shutting down Santana has merit, they're doing it at the expense of everything else. Seriously, Portis can't be stopped right now. The Randle El touchdown pass was pretty much perfectly executed. Man, the Eagles are just getting pushed around. Lay a hand on a guy, something. Wait, how can there be a late hit out of bounds on a guy when he's already got him by the face mask? The officiating in this game has been strange. I'm not saying 'bad', I'm saying 'strange'. What was that? The play clock freezes, the refs restart it, Reid apparently sends in an audible to McNabb, and they end up losing three yards? The Eagles are becoming last year's Redskins. (Hey, anybody out there watch Poker After Dark? Did you see last week with the amateur Featherstone's dream table? His play last week was pretty much how the Eagles played: a good start (flopping the straight against Hellmuth's two pair), a whole lot of nothing after that (his card deadness), a missed opportunity late (the 77 hand), and then a failed last gasp (getting outdrawn by Gavin at the end).) We also learned that the Redskins are better than a lot of people thought, myself included. The rain better end in Chicago soon because Bengals-Cowboys is going to suck long and hard. (Redskins 23, Eagles 17; Phillies 6, Brewers 2)
So if the Eagles are last year's Redskins, are the Giants last year's Patriots? (Giants 44, Seahawks 6)
And the Lions... well, they're definitely last year's Lions. (Bears 34, Lions 7)
You gotta slide. YOU GOTTA SLIDE! PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Dear God. I expect a screencap of Rosenfels getting helicoptered and fumbling to be a new FAIL picture meme within 10 days. (Colts 31, Texans 27)
Hey, Carson's back. Is it 17-0 yet? Well, it's close. What's going on with the Cowboys' offense? ONSIDE KICK~! Yep, just as I thought... Chris Perry sucks. I can't believe the Bengals are still in this game. Seriously, the Cowboys can't get anything going. I guess since the Bengals are freezing Ocho Cinco out they figured Dallas wouldn't expect them to go to Utecht, but that was still odd. I'm pretty sure either Crayton or Austin wasn't supposed to be there. T.O.: "God used me today for His glory." What? You caught two passes and almost got beat by the Bengals! I'm pretty sure God's better than that. (Cowboys 31, Bengals 22)
Did Heath Shuler win that Congressional seat? I don't remember. Brees never saw Winfield coming and he shouldn't have gotten close to him anyway. How do you miss that facemask call? How do you punt to Bush again after what happened earlier? Pass interference when you've got the guy doubled? That's a new one. Not the ending I was expecting. (Vikings 30, Saints 27)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (2-3, W2): Anquan Boldin breaking his face means more opportunities for Larry Fitzgerald, and combined with Chris Cooley faking everybody out, that equals another win for me.
JackSux V (4-1, W1): See, here's the thing about fantasy football: Portis running wild ticked me off as an Eagles fan, but he also helped get me my highest point total of the year.
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (4-0) - I feel like I'm on an island here
2. Tennessee (5-0) - Who saw THIS coming?
3. Washington (4-1) - Campbell getting better and better
(tie) Pittsburgh (4-1) - That was a revenge-fueled gut check
30. Cincinnati (0-5) - Yeah, Chris Henry'll help matters
31. Detroit (0-4) - I feel like the Lions should be contracted
32. St. Louis (0-4) - Blah
Mike and Mike floated the idea Monday morning that the start times for games on the East Coast where a West Coast team is visiting should be pushed back to 4 because the visiting team's gotten slaughtered every tine it's happened so far. I don't know if there's anything to that, but I don't know how else you explain this. (Dolphins 17, Chargers 10)
Snap. Crackle. Pop. (That's for the Rollins HR.) What a sweet drive. And that's why they drafted the kid. Though the refs never pick up the flag on a block in the back on a return (which happens ALL THE TIME), so that was kind of strange. I feel like Buck's going to be a step behind the seemingly random Phillies-related cheering all day. While the Eagles' idea of shutting down Santana has merit, they're doing it at the expense of everything else. Seriously, Portis can't be stopped right now. The Randle El touchdown pass was pretty much perfectly executed. Man, the Eagles are just getting pushed around. Lay a hand on a guy, something. Wait, how can there be a late hit out of bounds on a guy when he's already got him by the face mask? The officiating in this game has been strange. I'm not saying 'bad', I'm saying 'strange'. What was that? The play clock freezes, the refs restart it, Reid apparently sends in an audible to McNabb, and they end up losing three yards? The Eagles are becoming last year's Redskins. (Hey, anybody out there watch Poker After Dark? Did you see last week with the amateur Featherstone's dream table? His play last week was pretty much how the Eagles played: a good start (flopping the straight against Hellmuth's two pair), a whole lot of nothing after that (his card deadness), a missed opportunity late (the 77 hand), and then a failed last gasp (getting outdrawn by Gavin at the end).) We also learned that the Redskins are better than a lot of people thought, myself included. The rain better end in Chicago soon because Bengals-Cowboys is going to suck long and hard. (Redskins 23, Eagles 17; Phillies 6, Brewers 2)
So if the Eagles are last year's Redskins, are the Giants last year's Patriots? (Giants 44, Seahawks 6)
And the Lions... well, they're definitely last year's Lions. (Bears 34, Lions 7)
You gotta slide. YOU GOTTA SLIDE! PROTECT THE FOOTBALL. Dear God. I expect a screencap of Rosenfels getting helicoptered and fumbling to be a new FAIL picture meme within 10 days. (Colts 31, Texans 27)
Hey, Carson's back. Is it 17-0 yet? Well, it's close. What's going on with the Cowboys' offense? ONSIDE KICK~! Yep, just as I thought... Chris Perry sucks. I can't believe the Bengals are still in this game. Seriously, the Cowboys can't get anything going. I guess since the Bengals are freezing Ocho Cinco out they figured Dallas wouldn't expect them to go to Utecht, but that was still odd. I'm pretty sure either Crayton or Austin wasn't supposed to be there. T.O.: "God used me today for His glory." What? You caught two passes and almost got beat by the Bengals! I'm pretty sure God's better than that. (Cowboys 31, Bengals 22)
Did Heath Shuler win that Congressional seat? I don't remember. Brees never saw Winfield coming and he shouldn't have gotten close to him anyway. How do you miss that facemask call? How do you punt to Bush again after what happened earlier? Pass interference when you've got the guy doubled? That's a new one. Not the ending I was expecting. (Vikings 30, Saints 27)
FANTASY REPORT
aPaFL (2-3, W2): Anquan Boldin breaking his face means more opportunities for Larry Fitzgerald, and combined with Chris Cooley faking everybody out, that equals another win for me.
JackSux V (4-1, W1): See, here's the thing about fantasy football: Portis running wild ticked me off as an Eagles fan, but he also helped get me my highest point total of the year.
RANKINGS
1. N.Y. Giants (4-0) - I feel like I'm on an island here
2. Tennessee (5-0) - Who saw THIS coming?
3. Washington (4-1) - Campbell getting better and better
(tie) Pittsburgh (4-1) - That was a revenge-fueled gut check
30. Cincinnati (0-5) - Yeah, Chris Henry'll help matters
31. Detroit (0-4) - I feel like the Lions should be contracted
32. St. Louis (0-4) - Blah
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